Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 288

Today's Daily 5:

1. A very slow day after a really lousy night of sleep
2. Sitting on the patio in the sun to do some homework
3. Pumpkin muffins
4. making plans with friends for the next couple of days
5. Nectarine for breakfast

I Need Your Suggestions

Recently I've been trying to spend the last hour before I go to bed without using my laptop, or watching television.  The idea is to not have screen time, and help me to wind down before going to bed.  Theoretically taking an hour to wind down at night is supposed to help me sleep better.  At least that's the goal.

Mostly, I've been using that hour for a bit of prayer, and for reading.

And reading is where you come in.

Given my particular sensitivities, and penchant for nightmares, I have to be pretty careful about what I read right before I go to bed.  I need some suggestions for happy, not super heavy, funny, enjoyable reading material to fill that hour each night.

Have you read anything lately that might fit the bill?  Do you have any favorites that might work?  Leave them in the comments for me.  It's only been a couple of weeks of doing this, and I'm already hitting the end of my stockpiled list of "light" reading!

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 287

Today's Daily 5:

1. Starting off the day with three postcards in the mail from overseas, all now added to my wall of smiles
2. a successful trip to the library
3. a long hot shower
4. coming up with reasons to laugh after coming home to more ridiculous challenges in my living situation
5. a new mouse for my laptop - so nice to have a scroll wheel that works again
6. escapist television
7. the news that two good friends will be joining me at U2 on Wednesday
8. freshly washed sheets and pajamas
9. scented candles and an oil burner
10. Italian wedding soup

A Celtic Prayer

I've been using a little book of Celtic prayers each evening again lately, and last night I was particularly struck by the relevance and beauty of this cry for God's healing grace to descend on the world:

Like light dappling through the leaves of a tree
and wind stirring its branches,
like birdsong sounding from the heights of an orchard
and the scent of blossom after rainfall,
so you dapple and sound in the human soul,
so you stir into motion all that lives.
Let your graces of healing flow this night,
for my soul is wounded
and there is brokenness in my life.
Let you graces of healing flow, dear God,
for those whom I love are in need this night
and there are agonies in the life of the world.
There are agonies in the life of the world, O my soul,
and those whom I love are in pain.

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 286

Today's Daily 5:

1. Settling in to watch worship online
2. reading and resting outside in the sun
3. Wendys for lunch with family
4. feeling like I had a bit of energy today
5. watching one of my all-time favorite episodes of M*A*S*H*, "Dear Sigmund"

Stuff Worth Reading

I came across a couple of blog posts in the past few days that really spoke to me, and wanted to share them both with you.

Gitz wrote here about control, and being open to change.  It was a thought I needed to ponder again, as I'm in a space in the midst of a great number of hard changes.  I was also challenged by her comments about struggling with food and body image, since I've fought (and at times continue to fight) my own battles with food.

Over at JennyRain, she's talking about controlling healing.  This was a post I flagged in google reader and went back to several times over.  It's a topic I've been thinking a lot about the last few weeks.  My one word for the year is Heal, and that process hasn't turned out to look anything like what I thought it might.  It's been slower, messier, harder, and full of things I never thought I'd say or wrestle with.  And I've been struck again and again by how it's a process in God's hands, not mine.  A process that I can't control.

I'd love to hear your thoughts on these posts.  Or, if you've read something fabulous lately, leave a link for me in the comments.  I'd love to check it out!

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 285

Today's Daily 5:

1. the random experiences that come from having a dad who has a unique set of do-it-yourself skills.  Today I accompanied him to an autowrecker/pick your own part place.  And it's not the first time I've been to one.  I would guess not too many girls can say that, or list some of the other random adventures I've had with dad!  I've also been to welding supply shops, metal retailers, and a store inexplicably called "Princess Auto" that sells a whole range of industrial items for everything from farming to welding and electrical work! Unrelated to the DIY tendencies, other adventures with dad include sleeping in the truck, parked in a truckstop in middle of nowhere Montana, hiking places where there definitely are not trails, and camping in places where you dig your own toilet.  (Let me just add that I avoid that last adventure as an adult, but as a kid you don't exactly get asked where you want to go for summer vacation!)
2. licking icing off the beaters after baking
3. the wonderful feeling of waking up warm and cozy, buried under blankets after a nap on the couch
4. bright pink toenails
5. first nectarine of the season

Not Fashionable to Have Regrets

I've been slowly making my way back through Robert Benson's beautiful book, "Between the Dreaming and the Coming True," and wanted to share a few bits and pieces with you over the next few days.

He writes:

"In our age of individualism and self-reliance, it is not very fashionable to say that one has regrets about the past.  But it is dishonest of us to say that we do not.  If the choice were to be made now between the hell that I lived in for various times in my life - anger, divorce, loneliness, depression, fear of failure - then I am as glad as anyone to be where I am today.  And I am perfectly capable of swimming in the existential stream that says that all of those things were necessary in order for me to be where I am today, a place in which I am very happy.  But I do not for one moment imagine that all of the things that have happened to me, and all of the terrible things I have done to others, were imagined for me by the One who dreamed me up."  (pg. 78-79)

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 284

Today's Daily 5:

1. Feeling like my concerns were heard
2. some unexpected freebies
3. pork and mango tacos
4. a day where I could mostly hide inside, away from all the rain and cold
5. buses that were (mostly) on time, in spite of the bad weather

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 283

Today's Daily 5:

1. Raspberry jam
2. reading a novel that I really enjoyed
3. a hot bath
4. some unexpected relieving news health wise
5. a good appointment

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 282

Today's Daily 5:

1. Bend it Like Beckham
2. going for a walk
3. getting a trip to the library accomplished
4. Vietnamese take out
5. a mostly quiet evening

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 281

Today's Daily 5:

1. a lazy morning
2. Mexican lasagna
3. sharing tea with a dear friend
4. the blessing of a long baby nap, giving time for uninterrupted conversation
5. playing with a very cute baby
6. "inspirational" cooking

Lazy Mornings

I'm still working to sort out some health stuff, and more than anything, it's leading to a lack of energy and long lazy mornings in bed.

Yesterday I got up early to meet a friend for breakfast, and after I was dropped off back at home ended up crawling back into bed immediately to nap for another couple of hours.

It's been a week for internal wrestles, and processing in a more private forum than this blog.

And a week for lazy mornings.  Eating, doing email, reading, writing and sleeping.

I'm thankful that I have time for that right now, that my life is in a place that allows for lazy mornings.

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 280

Today's Daily 5:

1. rain sounds against the bus shelter
2. hot tea
3. a tasty muffin at a local cafe
4. sharing breakfast and tea with a friend who knows my history
5. seat warmers in a car
6. tiny sprouts appearing in my garden where I planted seeds
7. candles lit all around my room
8. Watching favorite television (episodes of M*A*S*H* and the season premiere of The Bachelorette)
9. Sheep wool slippers
10. 1 year, 280 days of making daily 5 lists

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 279

Today's Daily 5:

1. a banana for breakfast
2. Sunday morning home alone
3. strawberry smoothie
4. M*A*S*H* T-shirt
5. watching a robin in the back yard
6. planting flowers and herbs in my garden
7. the first shower in a freshly cleaned bathroom
8. crossing everything that needed to be done today off my list
9. eating frozen chocolate chip cookies
10. the smell of chlorine in cleaning products, that always reminds me of hours spent in the swimming pool as a kid
11. putting on pajamas still warm from the dryer
12. freshly painted finger and toe nails (I went with a deep pink for the toes this time)
13. Coconut body butter

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 278

For the first time in ages, last night I totally forgot to transfer my Daily 5 list from my phone to this space.  So, here's yesterday's Daily 5:

1. Lunch on a patio in the sun
2. Sweet chili chicken from Joey's
3. an Almond Joy bar
4. One of those rare days where I felt pretty, with minimal effort
5. watching and transcribing the monologues from the last two episodes of Grey's Anatomy
6. An evening at home alone, watching the Food Network
7. Eating a comfort meal
8. getting a call from a friend that offered just a bit of hope for restoring the data on my external harddrive
9. a hot shower
10. getting a couple errands finished

Mismatched

Do you ever have days where your insides just don't match your outsides, or am I the only one?

I'm having that kind of day today.

For the first time in a while, I feel like I look good, and it was an effortless fluke.

I'm wearing clothes I love, a great scarf and earrings, and somehow, even though all I did was shower and then finger comb my hair back into a ponytail on my way out the door, even that is working for me today.  I feel pretty, and pulled together on the outside anyway.

Inside?  Totally a neurotic mess.

I'm obsessing over a decision I have to make, and a maybe even a few I have already made.

I've worried about some health stuff.

I've spent quite a bit of time dealing with a minor computer disaster that happened late Thursday night which may still result in the loss of all the photos I've taken in the last five years, and a good chunk of my music library.

I look good on the outside (which, by the way, is totally a feeling that I'm celebrating!) but I'm totally a mess on the inside, and I'm thinking about the way that inside and outside don't often seem to match. 

I'm okay, I really am, just pondering the juxtaposition of moods and experiences going on in me today.

So tell me, am I the only one who often feels mismatched?

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 277

Today's Daily 5:

1. sleeping late
2. doing a bunch of reading
3. watching old episodes of M*A*S*H*
4. Butter chicken
5. homemade (not microwave) popcorn with butter and salt
6. watching the season finales of three favorite shows online
7. ballet flats and skinny jeans
8. neck pillow
9. a weekend at mom and dad's
10. wearing a beautiful scarf

Friday

It's the beginning of a long weekend and my plans are decidedly low key.

They involve watching some television online, and doing a few errands.

Sleep.

Maybe yoga, if my shoulder is up to it.

Somewhere in the last two weeks I managed to badly aggravate the car accident shoulder injury.

I've been avoiding yoga (and especially downward dog) like the plague, trying to convince my shoulder to loosen up and heal.

There will be lots of reading.

And maybe a little bit of cooking.

And hopefully sleep.

I'm aiming, still, for rest and restoration.

For time for breathing.

For joy and laughter.

For continued small steps of healing.

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 276

Today's Daily 5:

1. Sleeping late after a night of dreaming
2. Pork Buns purchased in China Town
3. reading in a hot bath
4. Italian wedding soup
5. finishing two separate books today

Looking Forward

Since I'm all about celebrating even the small things, here are a few things, both bigger and smaller, that I'm looking forward to the next several weeks:

• Looking forward to watching the season finales of Grey's Anatomy and Private Practice online tomorrow
• Looking forward to hanging out with a dear friend, and her daughter next week
• Looking forward to seeing all of the vegetables and flowers I planted grow, and then cooking with them
• Looking forward to two weeks of house-sitting for my folks - two weeks of staying in the same bed every night!
• Looking forward to spending some time bus reading in the near future
• Looking forward to finally seeing U2 live in concert!

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 275

Today's Daily 5:

1. tulips blooming
2. The new television show, The Voice
3. baking cookies
4. an afternoon nap
5. a house church leaders meeting (and meal together) tonight

Labyrinth

On Monday I met up with a dear friend at an old church downtown, and together we walked a labyrinth.

In the past I've walked labyrinths with something specific in mind to pray through as I walked.  Monday wasn't like that.  After spending a week flat on my back sick last week, I didn't have anything specific in mind to pray through on this trip.  I simply started walking and let my heart be open to God's leading.

I was struck by the need to focus only on the steps just in front of me if I was going to stay on the path.

I was caught by the experience of walking the path with a friend.  Sometimes ahead and sometimes behind, sometimes parallel and sometimes walking in different directions, but together, sharing the journey.

And as I walked, I pondered what was the word for the walk, and thought about my one word for the year, "heal".  The word for the walk was "peace".  The last couple weeks have been filled with some really hard decisions and not a lot of peace.  So I walked and focused on the steps just in front of me, and breathed deeply, and let peace come.

I thought about how "heal" hasn't looked anything like I thought it would on December 31st as I prayerfully chose it as my one word for the year.  It's looked totally different than I thought it would, and, if I'm honest, that has been discouraging at times.  It's involved humility, surrender, and a whole lot of wrestle.  And I thought about the need to simply focus on the step just in front of me, to just see that step, that moment of healing, instead of becoming overwhelmed by the immensity of the myriad of steps beyond that.  I thought about the friends who are walking this journey with me, encouraging and praying for me.

And I thought about a dozen other little things, as God's voice took over and I walked and prayed.

It was such a lovely thing to share that sacred quiet space with a friend.  The silence was so needed, and the peace it carried with it was precisely what my soul needed after the last few weeks.

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 274

Today's Daily 5:

1. planting flowers
2. a long, hot shower
3. a super lazy morning
4. feeling a bit like myself
5. making it through a more challenging, melancholy day, with relative peace

Insite, Harm Reduction, Poverty, Drugs and Faith

A month or so ago I had the chance to hear Meera Bai speak about her time working at Insite, North America's only legalized drug injection site, located in Vancouver's downtown eastside.  She spoke passionately about her time at InSite, and the importance of harm reduction, and how that fits with her Christian faith.  Tonight I came across these youtube interviews with Meera, and had to share them.  If you have the time to watch one, or all of them, I recommend them, if for nothing else than that they provide a very challenging perspective.

You can also sign a petition here asking the Federal Government to withdraw their lawsuit seeking to close Insite.  It will take two minutes of your time if you're willing to add your voice to this important cause.

One Year

A year ago today, my life changed drastically.

At the end of the work day, I was called into a manager's office, and told that my three year tenure with the company at which I was employed had come to an end.  Immediately.  They watched as I packed my office, escorted me down the elevator to a taxi, and sent on my way, with decisions to make about signing documents and severance.

I did a lot of crying, consulted a few trusted advisers, gritted my teeth, decided to take the money I was being offered, and choose to see this as God's hand moving me forward.  Two days later I left for a two week road trip with my dad, and a few weeks after that I announced that I was going to pursue nursing as a career.

A year later, I can tell you that my life, though it looks nothing like I thought it might, is better for the end of my tenure at the company that my roommates referred to as "the soap opera." 

But there remains painful twinges, as I think about that day.  It's a bit of a humiliating thing to have a job end that way.  Escorted out as if you can't be trusted.  No chance to say goodbye to the friends you've shared the days with for three plus years.

It wasn't the start to a new path that I would have chosen.  It's yet another thing in my life where I have to look at it and say, "even with that, I trust you, Jesus."

It has ushered in new and unexpected things, and today, as I ponder them, as I ponder this year of healing, I feel just a bit melancholy and sad.  It's different than I would have chosen, because so rarely do my plans seem to be in synch with God's, but it's good.  Today I'm thinking about the losses of this year of deconstruction, and praying for the healing and rebuilding that has begun.

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 273

Today's Daily 5:

1. Good bus connections
2. Comfy skinny jeans
3. labyrinth walking
4. sharing laughter over food with a dear friend
5. bakery air
6. peach mango smoothie
7. chinese pork buns
8. 7-Up
9. a ride home after dinner
10. early evening into pajamas

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 272

Today's Daily 5:

1. the feeling of a hot shower on sore muscles
2. canned peaches
3. banana chocolate chip muffin
4. a really lazy Sunday
5. blended strawberry lemonade

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 271

Today's Daily 5:

1. The feeling that comes from waking up from a really good sleep for the first time in quite a while
2. Waking up feeling hopeful
3. Gardening in the sun (I planted three kinds of lettuce, two kinds of onions, parsley, basil, green beans and beets)
4. the great feeling that comes from watching television while cuddling under a freshly washed blanket that smells of lovely fabric softener
5. laughing, hard, over a phone call from a friend in another country needing information about the traffic situation she was stuck in, and wondering if I could please google for her and find out what was up.  (I'm still laughing at this one several hours later!)

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 270

Today's Daily 5:

1. a really good appointment
2. an afternoon spent resting
3. banana chocolate chip muffins
4. visiting the Calgary tower with a friend for the first time since we were kids
5. dinner at The Mongolie Grill and great conversation

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 269

(since blogger was down yesterday, here is yesterday's daily 5)

Today's Daily 5:

1. brightly colored buildings
2. sunshine
3. Iced passion tea lemonade
4. wearing a new skirt
5. a really great house church gathering

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 268

Today's Daily 5:

1. first day going outside for the day without a jacket
2. an afternoon nap
3. 7-Up
4. peanut-butter puffed wheat squares
5. re-reading a book that has spoken profoundly in the past, and finding that it is speaking again

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 267

Today's Daily 5:

1. A banana for breakfast
2. reading outside in the sun for a little while
3. brain candy novels
4. drinking 7-Up out of the bottle, through a straw
5. watching re-runs of Friends on DVD and having to laugh

Reverb 11 - May

The May Reverb Prompt is:

If you participated in Reverb 10 during December of last year, are any of the things you wanted to manifest in 2011 revealing themselves?

Well, the big thing that I was hoping would manifest is healing.

And I think it is, though, as usual, it looks nothing like what I'd expected.

It has looked like decisions I never expected to make, and a semester of school I'd preferred to have avoided.  It has looked like long conversations, changes in relationships, and even stepping into a few things I was certain I wasn't ready for, but that God has asked for.

And it has looked like a million little things that can't be named or shared.

But it is happening.  It just looks different than I thought it might.

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 266

Today's Daily 5:

1. a day that had nothing scheduled after a fairly rough night of sleep
2. podcasts - I love that I can access a whole variety of quality teaching from all over the world and listen to it on my laptop or iphone
3. flipping the calendar in my room at mom and dad's to May (ya, I'm 9 days late) and smiling as a scene with palm trees replaced the beach view from April
4. Coming home and tacking a few new items to my wall of smiles, and then pausing to study it and be reminded of the people who love me, and whom I love and pray for
5. taking the time to clean my bedroom at grandma's, and restore order for the first time in quite a while
6. listening to worship music from Kim Walker Smith
7. popping in a movie I love and letting it play in the background as I puttered around
8. getting a few necessary errands done today
9. making peanut butter puffed wheat squares
10. candles that add atmosphere and heat to a cold basement bedroom

Monday

It's mid-morning Monday (such lovely alliteration there) and it has been days since I've paused in this space to record anything but a nightly Daily 5 list.

For the first time in what seems a very long time, years really, I find myself realizing that I don't need to weigh what I say in this space for fear of some in my "real life" who may be reading.  And yet, I almost feel as if I've lost the ability to share myself here.  As if it has descended into a sort of murky silence.

I'm waiting out some health stuff right now.  Waiting for my body to adapt to new changes in supplements and medications.  Waiting to see if initial side-effects will diminish.  Waiting for restful sleep of some sort (since sleep has never been one of my great skills) to return.

I'm thinking about changes.

About needing to find work for the summer.  And how my tired body and soul would instead prefer to hop on a plane to almost anywhere, preferably somewhere near a very large body water, somewhere with sunshine and warmth, and spend a summer resting and reorienting to all of the changes that have come in the last years.

I think of an option in the back of my mind - an option for travel to a new continent that vaguely exists - and I'm tempted to jump at it.  And yet, I know that it would not actually be an option that would fit me well.  That would fit my heart and life.  But as an option, as an escape, it is tantalizing at times, and I dream again of travel and new places.  Of people and prayer and time away for reorienting and reconstructing. 

But it would need to be time away that would not leave me drained, the way so many of the trips, long and short, that I've made over the last few years have done.  Time away that would restore, and contribute to healing.  And that limits my options more significantly.  In the meantime, if the weather brightens this week, watching these words flow across the screen convinces me that time at the zoo and perhaps in a park are going to be necessary.

This is again a season of in-between.  It's the place I've been existing for much of the last year.  The season of waiting and wondering.  I need to find work, but I don't know for how long I need to be employed.  I'm waiting to hear if I will be accepted into the nursing program for September.  If I'm honest, I'm growing tired of waiting.  I'm ready for settled.  I'm growing tired of juggling a longing for things, with a desire to protect my heart from the hurt that comes from wanting deeply and having those desires fail to be fulfilled.

And so I wait.  And this week that will look like time spent applying for jobs, and time spent reading.  I hope it will look like time spent sitting in the sun, at the zoo or in a park.  Perhaps time spent writing.  Most definitely time spent thinking and praying.  There will probably be a bit of cleaning and cooking or baking thrown in, and a few yoga classes.  And yes, likely some daydreaming about airplanes and big bodies of water.  (Watching the finale of The Amazing Race last night would have been comical if you were inside my head.  Mixed into all the dialogue around the room about the various competitors was a nearly obsessive noticing of palm trees in the location in which they wrapped up the season.  Even in a wild wind storm, those palm trees look enticing.  Oh, and if you'd been in my head you would have also been privy to an astonishing number of thoughts about the woman who was providing the final clue, and the stunning ability of her hairdo to remain immobile despite the windstorm!)

And with that, I'd better stop writing and kick off my week of activities of waiting!  See you tonight for the daily 5.

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 265

Today's Daily 5:

1. 1 year, 265 days of making these lists
2. a very lazy Sunday
3. Harvey's Burger's for lunch with dad
4. wearing a very pretty new scarf
5. watching the finale of The Amazing Race with a bunch of extended family and laughing at the jokes my cousin was making

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 264

Today's Daily 5:

1. the start of something new
2. tea and walking all over downtown with a friend
3. a beautiful new scarf that I purchased using a groupon bought months ago
4. the friend I was with today was recently in the US, and brought me several Almond Joy bars.  I'd been quite looking forward to having one, and it didn't disappoint
5. watching the movie Sabrina (the Harrison Ford version) with my parents - it's one my dad and I have always loved and it was fun to watch it together over dinner and laugh at the great lines in it.  "I found myself in Paris." Love it.

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 263

Today's Daily 5:

1. I love that anyplace there is a selection of books for sale, there is immediately the opportunity to pleasantly pass a chunk of time browsing
2. my first paid massage in probably 9 months
3. an appointment I'd been dreading that went as well as it possibly could, and was the opposite of my expectations
4. getting my grades for the semester back and having them be really good and feeling like I can actually hope that the nursing thing might actually happen this fall
5. the smell of rainy air
6. freebies - samples in the mail and via other routes today
7. a moment when I felt God whispering and reminding me to keep pursuing healing
8. lots of time to read as I rode buses to and from three separate appointments and waited for those appointments today - I started and finished a perfectly enjoyable brainless novel - just nice light reading - and it was lovely
9. food at mom and dad's
10. the promise of my favorite Almond Joy bars from a friend arriving tomorrow (Today was a day that needed chocolate and didn't have any, so this is a very sweet thing to anticipate.)
    

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 262

Today's Daily 5:

1. An email from a newish friend tonight that made me smile with the timing of it all
2. An afternoon spent preparing for house church tonight, and thinking and praying about some things coming up in the next few days
3. reading in the bath tub
4. an email from another friend that didn't have a subject line or introduction, just a list of dates that The Bachelorette will be airing, and what country's they'll be visiting.  Now officially counting down to a summer of Monday nights filled with totally brainless entertainment and trading snarky emails with a dear friend in another country as we watch.
5. the convenience of having an iphone - I really do love my phone!

Thursday

I'm still finding myself at a loss for words.

This has been an odd sort of week as I've wrestled with some decisions.

And there are things going on in the world.

Things I have opinions about. The response to Bin Laden's death.  The Canadian election.  Thoughts about some of the reading I've been doing.

All things I've been mentally pondering and wanting to have conversations over.

But they're the kinds of things that just don't seem right for discussion in writing in a public forum.  They're the kinds of things that require a cup of tea and being able to see facial expressions and hear vocal tones.

Tomorrow is a rather pivotal day for me.  The center of some decisions and wrestling.  I'm hoping that after tomorrow the distractions will be less prevalent, and there will be things to share again.  Things to write about and rant about and laugh at and muse on over a cup of tea.

In the meantime, I could definitely use your prayers again over the next couple of days.

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 261

Today's Daily 5:

1. a really lazy morning in bed after a late night
2. flip flop weather
3. Skype date with L. 
4. Laughing at a sign for a restaurant located in a car wash. According to the sign, it's the place to go for both Halal Schwarma AND Sushi!
5. a great yoga class
6. the feeling of crawling into a bed with freshly washed sheets
7. an evening of escapist television
8. getting a few minutes of laughter and chatting with another dear friend on the phone
9. clean drinking water
10. finding reasons to laugh

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 260

Today's Daily 5:

1. Visiting the zoo and seeing Baby Jengo, the newest baby giraffe.  (I totally giggled when I read his birth statistics - he was born 6'6" tall and weighing 185 pounds!)
2. Sitting in a warm, humid garden at the zoo, under a palm tree, watching butterflies
3. listening to a podcast interview with Anne Jackson
4. making an appointment for a massage on Friday
5. taking photos
6. laughing over dinner conversation with my friend F.  (She knows exactly the right moments to make me laugh - I've got a fork ready for the awkward conversation I'm dreading on Friday!)  I love dinner with a friend where the topics covered range from work stories, to books, to crazy experiences with God.
7. a good treatment tonight
8. curling up in bed, with candles lit
9. the way my newish earring organizer catches the light from the candles
10. dozing on the couch this afternoon

Zoo

I'm heading out to the zoo in a few minutes.  It's been months since I spent time at my favorite place, and I need it today.

I've had a headache, with intensity varying from disabling, to nipping at the edges of my consciousness, for 8 straight days.

I have some big decisions to make, and some big prayer for myself and others needs on my heart.

So I'm going to the zoo.

To visit my gorillas, and some palm trees.

To walk and think and pray.

To hopefully hear from Jesus, and find rest and peace.

To consider trust, and healing.

Later today I'm having dinner with a long time friend, and then I have a natural health treatment that I'm hoping against hope will alleviate the headache.

But for now, I'm off to spend some time in a place that has always been peaceful for me.  To take back some of that space in my heart and head that other voices and things had occupied.  To take back a physical space that I haven't been able to occupy in a while.  To just be for a bit.

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 259

Today's Daily 5:

1. Getting the chance to be involved in supporting the democratic process
2. Voting
3. fun coworkers to spend the day with
4. great snacks
5. an extra night crashing at mom and dad's

Election Day

I'm spending twelve or more hours today working at a polling place for Elections Canada as a registration officer.  It's a one day gig, that pays decently.

I'm also voting in the election today.

Per usual, in my riding, I'll be voting for a losing candidate.

I live in the Prime Minister's riding.  The riding that never elects anyone but conservatives.  A riding in a city that the Conservative Party is so confident they'll win, that the Prime Minister hasn't even bothered to campaign here.  He won't even make an appearance in this riding until election day.  (This fact, by the way, drives me crazy.  I'm fully of the opinion that those who have the Prime Minister as their MP lose out, because he never has to pay the same attention to his own riding that other MP's do.  Someone justified this to me by telling me that he has staff for that.  My problem with that is that his staff were not elected to represent me.)

In any case, I'll be away from my computer and phone all day today.  I can have my phone at the polling place, but it can't be turned on.

I'll see you all tonight, when I will almost certainly watch with disappointment as a candidate I didn't vote for gets elected as my MP, and quite likely as our Prime Minister.

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 258

Today's Daily 5:

1. Getting my email inbox down to zero
2. spending the morning watching the food network and enjoying an empty house
3. Duff's laugh on Ace of Cakes
4. getting an impromptu invitation to spend the afternoon walking by the river with my friend M.
5. Iced passion tea lemonade

Most Read Posts April 2011

The most read posts in the month of April were:

1. Facebook Status Updates that Will Never Make It
2. How Many of Me?
3. Heal: One Word 2011 Update
4. Amidst It
5. Good Friday
6. Thursday in Rome
7. Practice Resurrection
8. One Thousand Gifts
9. The Virtue of Flexibility
10. Change of Plans

Margaret Atwood on writing

I've never read a Margaret Atwood book.  (I know, I know, what kind of Canadian am I?)  The truth is that I started one or two, and just couldn't get into them, and so I gave up.  But, the other day I came across this quote from her, on writing, and loved it, and wanted to share:

“You most likely need a thesaurus, a rudimentary grammar book, and a grip on reality. This latter means: there’s no free lunch. Writing is work. It’s also gambling. You don’t get a pension plan. Other people can help you a bit, but essentially you’re on your own. Nobody is making you do this: you chose it, so don’t whine.”

- Margaret Atwood