Thursday Randomness

It's Thursday, and my week goes on slowly and restfully, just the way I like it.

I've been using this time off to hang out with friends, to catch up on things at home.

Today is dedicated once again to some cleaning, to my to do list, and to trying out a new recipe in the crockpot.

I'm spending time this week pondering my body and food again, slowly considering new habits and ways of addressing things.

I'm trying to build in time for creativity, amidst all the practical things that need accomplishing during this time off.

Basically I'm enjoying a slow sort of randomness.

Nothing particularly connected.  Just time for my heart to rest.

Time for me to reflect, to ponder, to meditate quietly.

Just the way I like it.

Luxuriating

I am luxuriating in the time off from school that I'm currently enjoying.

Yes, I'm tackling to do lists and projects, but I'm doing them in stillness, and at a pace that really works for me. (Yes, stillness, my word for the year is Still, so it's nice to embrace it in this way, instead of hunting for it amidst busy chaos.)

I stayed up way too late last night, puttering and reading online.

I slept in way too long this morning, making up for the staying up late.

But it's lovely.

And today I'm tackling little things - resume updating, menu planning, blog post writing.

I'm going to read and respond to comments on last week's post about the body and food.

I'm going to go through some boxes to see if I can locate the vegetable steamer and crockpot that have been in storage for two years, to make my living situation more flexible, and allow me to have a bit more creativity in meal planning.

I'm going to clean off my desk which has been the dumping spot for the detritus of the last couple weeks.

I'm going to knit.

I'm going to watch last night's episode of The Amazing Race (even though it makes the travel bug within me ache painfully) and vicariously enjoy the travels of other people.

I'm might go for a walk, or do a yoga video.

Basically, I'm going to luxuriate, and I think it's going to be amazing.

It's Monday

It's Monday, and it's not a long weekend.

By the time this post goes live, I'll as usual be on a bus, on my way downtown to work.

I'll probably be reading, though I might be browsing emails, or simply trying to stay awake.

A week or so ago I learned that the morning bus commute is decidedly NOT a good time to do the meditation exercises that a trusted advisor recommended I do on a daily basis.  Turns out that doing them at that time of the morning mostly leads to falling asleep on the bus.

I'm coming off a very full week, and a busy weekend of tackling things like reading, correspondence that I was behind on, and some baking.

I'm heading into an equally full week, and sorting out how to juggle all of the little things that need to be accomplished, and how to prioritize, and which things really can be let slide just a bit.

That said, both weeks have had and will have more than the normal amount of chances to be with and speak with friends, and I've been grateful for that.  There is a blessing in having heart friends, and in managing to find time with them.  There is blessing, too, in embracing some ministry opportunities that have required a more full compliment of my attention lately.

And so, I'm here, because this is one of the few days this week that doesn't boast evening plans with friends, or ministry obligations.  I'm here, and I'm thinking about and praying for the week ahead.  I'm wondering what sort of humorous adventures it might hold (for example, last week because of work, I can now quite humorously boast that on a stressful day I purchased my first ever pack of cigarettes! (for my boss people, for my boss!))  And I can wonder just exactly what heartbreaks or challenges this week will also hold.

It's a new week.  A Monday.  Not a long weekend.

I'm praying, waiting, and looking for moments of thankfulness.

In between...

In between a thousand and one little things and commitments this week, I'm:

• thankful for some tiny answers to prayer
• offering up prayers for some acquaintances whose newly adopted 2.5 year old daughter was diagnosed with leukemia this week
• recognizing that working means I don't have the time I used to have, and sorting out what will be a priority, and what might be scrapped all together
• trying to take more time for private journaling
• fitting in reading in fits and starts, mostly while commuting from place to place
• paring down the blogs in my google reader, and setting up a folder system there - no more subscribing just because you had one good post, I don't have time to read through it all anymore... and some are going into a folder for consumption on weekends, when I have time, only...
• trying to sort out times and spaces for stealing just a bit of quiet

Here it Goes

I'll be on a bus by the time this post goes live this morning.

That's right, this admittedly night person has accepted a job that requires me to be in the office by 7:30, which means on a bus by before 6:30 am.

So, here it goes.  I'm starting this four month administrative position today, and then I'm heading out to grab some dinner, and catch a yoga class, before coming home to bed and starting this thing over again.

This being up so early thing will definitely take some adapting.  And restructuring my evening schedule, my routine, and engaging a level of personal discipline.  All things that will take time to adapt to. 

But, I'm delighted that I have a steady schedule and income for the next season.  And I'm actually so pleased that this comes at the end of a week in which I've actively engaged silence and rest.  This last week of rest and quiet was so needed as I head into a busier and fuller season again.

So, here it goes!  See you tonight with the Daily 5!

Thursday

I'm still finding myself at a loss for words.

This has been an odd sort of week as I've wrestled with some decisions.

And there are things going on in the world.

Things I have opinions about. The response to Bin Laden's death.  The Canadian election.  Thoughts about some of the reading I've been doing.

All things I've been mentally pondering and wanting to have conversations over.

But they're the kinds of things that just don't seem right for discussion in writing in a public forum.  They're the kinds of things that require a cup of tea and being able to see facial expressions and hear vocal tones.

Tomorrow is a rather pivotal day for me.  The center of some decisions and wrestling.  I'm hoping that after tomorrow the distractions will be less prevalent, and there will be things to share again.  Things to write about and rant about and laugh at and muse on over a cup of tea.

In the meantime, I could definitely use your prayers again over the next couple of days.

A Few More Days of Quiet

I'm in the hazy land of days immediately following the end of a semester.  The days where my brain refuses to form many conscious thoughts.

On Tuesday I completed my last two final exams.  I celebrated with a late evening dose of Macdonalds, my trashy "treat" comfort food of choice.

I spent Wednesday resting, watching mindless television, reading something other than textbooks, shopping for skinny jeans with my brother's girlfriend,  and attending a 90 minute yoga class for the first time in a couple weeks.

Today is starting with an appointment with my eye doctor, and then continuing in yesterday's pattern, and ending tonight with house church, where I'm teaching again.  I'm actually looking forward to that.

In the meantime, I'm still in the post school, can't quite form deep, reflective thoughts stage, so you'll have to forgive me if there are a few more days of quiet around this space.  I'll be back as soon as I've had a bit of rest.

Monday Stuff

My day started with a four am waking from a rough dream.

A bit more sleep, in and out of dreams.

A lazy morning, spent mostly in bed.

And now, a day that calls for yoga clothes.  Comfort being key.

Hours of studying to do for the last two exams tomorrow.

Probably a workout of some sort (most likely yoga.  I will be dressed for it, after all).  Maybe an errand or two.  A little bit of reading.  Slot in a few study breaks.

But mostly studying.

And maybe a little journaling.  My day did start, after all, with a rough dream that remains hard, even eight hours later, to shake.

Change of Plans

I received a call yesterday morning informing me that the job I'd accepted a couple weeks ago had decided I wasn't a great fit, and that Sunday was my last shift.  I was understandably quite shocked, and a little hurt, and also relieved.  I'd actually phoned someone on Saturday and commented that I was feeling like I had perhaps made a rushed decision, and the job wasn't a fit.  I was literally dreading going in to my shifts, the way I'd felt at the job that my roommates at the time fondly referred to as "the soap opera". 

So, I'm looking for summer work again, which is a pain, but also a relief. 

And, I have another chance in this, to practice trust.  In God's provision, and his plans.  Not my easiest skill, but one I'm definitely getting a lot of chances to try for.

In the meantime, this week holds several mornings where I don't have to set an alarm, where I can try to catch up on some sleep.  The mornings are still holding dreams, but they're easier to deal with when I'm getting extra hours of sleep.

For today, I'll head to mom and dad's in a while and spend the day studying.

My list looks like this:

• arrange for a transcript to be sent to the university as part of my application for nursing school
• fill out and fax an evaluation form for a class I'm just finishing this semester
• print off the lecture notes that I took for the history class that my next final exam is in
• review those notes
• tackle a bit of the final reading for that class that was set aside the last week or two of class while I was busy working and writing papers
• begin the process of reviewing and memorizing for my greek and latin words exam next week (there's something like 800 word bases that I need to know...)
• drop a birthday card for a friend in the mail
• fit in a yoga practice
• return a few books to the library
• make it to a natural health treatment appointment
• take time to do a bit of reading just for fun
• do a load of laundry
• if I happen to be near a branch of my bank, I also have a cheque to deposit
• I may also do a quick search for jobs and send out some resumes

looking at it written out like this, it seems like a lot, but I'm actually planning a quite relaxed schedule.  Most of those tasks won't take all that long.  It should be a decently paced day, I think.

The Non-Negotiables

These are the things that I consider non-negotiable for today:

• attend both of my scheduled classes
• finish writing (or get to the point where only polish is needed) my last term paper.  I need about 1500 more words, but that shouldn't be too hard to accomplish (I'm hoping anyway!)
• attend a ninety minute yoga class

Everything else today is gravy.

That said, I just spent an hour where I could have been working on my paper playing a game online instead.  My brain wasn't quite awake yet, and diving into the territory of the phenomenon of witch-hunting that followed the Protestant Reformation just wasn't something I was up to.  So, it'll get done this afternoon and evening.

I'm also going "home" to grandma's tonight.  First night in my own bed since last Thursday.  Of the seven nights that will make up this week, I'm only spending two of them in my bed.  Usually I spend four.  It's been that kind of week, and I've been grateful for a soft place to land at mom and dad's.  This morning, for example, it bought me almost an extra hour of sleep, since I only needed to take one bus to get to school instead of two.  An extra hour is a big deal on a night when the lights aren't switched off until well past midnight.

It's the kind of week where everything feels like slogging, sometimes marginally easier than others, but almost always slogging.  So.  The goal is to get the non-negotiables done, and all the rest is gravy.  (Which, by the way, despite the fact that I almost never like sauces, I happen to love.  Go figure.)

Tuesday Morning, Resting

This is the first day in several weeks where I haven't had to crawl out of bed early, rushing off to work, or school, or some other commitment that was stealing my time, and I am savoring it, still nested under blankets, though it's now closer to afternoon than morning.

I fought for a few extra hours of sleep this morning, pushing through the dreams that lately have been haunting the last hours before I wake.  Each time they roused me, I rolled over, turned on a new piece of music, or a sermon, and let the notes or voices carry me back into sleep.

I stayed at mom and dad's last night, since I was out late with them, watching my brother play hockey, and it didn't make sense to go home for a few hours, only to crawl out of bed early and return to their house.  It was nice to have an extra night here, without the stresses of the crazy living situation at grandma's house.  Without the way her house seems to intensify the dreams.

I've been awake for a few hours now, laying here, quietly reading a novel that I picked up at the library last night.

I'm fighting a cold that began to make itself known yesterday with full sinuses and an aching throat, and this quiet morning is much needed, since it will be a rarity in this month of juggling responsibilities and commitments.

In a few minutes, I'm getting up.  A shower, some food, a bit of yoga, then settling in to tackle the next term paper on my agenda.  The last term paper.  The one that needs to be basically accomplished before I go to bed tomorrow night, since it is due on Friday, and my usual Thursday day off for writing will be mostly filled with a shift at work, and then teaching at house church.  So, I will write, today, tonight, and tomorrow night, and polish a little after work on Thursday, before printing and submitting on Friday.  And then, then the papers will be done and it will be time to study for the final exams that begin on Monday.

And so, my day begins with rest and then picks up speed.  Here I go.

Busy

I'm having the kind of day where my thoughts are running a thousand directions at once.

I'm pondering some teaching on Islam that I've received over the last several Sunday evenings, and the ways that that teaching is completely contradictory to other things that I've heard and read.

I'm thinking about an appointment I had on the weekend, and balancing relationships and health and boundaries and all that good stuff.

I'm sitting in a classroom, waiting for the last of a series of Monday morning tutorials to begin.  A series of tutorials that I will absolutely NOT miss an hour from now when they've concluded.  The sort of tutorials where the Teaching Assistant one spent 20 minutes working to impart the point that "pop culture tries to influence us."  Not exactly a stunning revelation.

It's the last week of classes.  I have one more term paper to write.  And then five final exams.  Throw in a part-time job, various and sundry health appointments, a few yoga classes, a teaching commitment at house church, my brother's graduation from Bible school, a friend's wedding, Easter, and I can't even remember what else, and it definitely promises to be a busy next three weeks.

That, of course, means that I have no idea what blogging will look like during that time, other than, of course, the Daily 5. 

Wish me luck!  A lot rides on these exams...

To Do

So, this morning I worked my first shift at my new job.

I'm working for a small company that makes 100% natural soap, bath and body products and operates a number of stores in Western Canada, and I'm totally excited about it.

I then came home, and stared at my April calendar.

It's going to be a busy month, with research papers and two more weeks of classes, and then 5 final exams.  Add to that leading at house church, the basic commitments to things like getting a decent amount of sleep and exercise, some medical appointments, a wedding to attend, my brother's graduation from Bible school, and now a job, and you have the makings for a little bit of a wild month.

So, I did what I usually do.  I made a list.

This is what my list looks like:

Shortly after I wrote that list, I added several more items.  Those are the outside of class and work hours things that need to be accomplished between today and next Saturday.  Everything from wrapping a present, to preparing to lead at house church, to Latin/Greek homework, to writing a term paper on Che Guevara.  The list doesn't include the stuff that gets done daily outside of class or work hours - things like exercise, scripture reading, and so forth.

It's going to be a busy week, but I think it's doable.  Some of it is flexible and not super time sensitive, and if it waits another few weeks, it waits.

And, I'm kind of looking forward to it.  To the satisfaction of pushing for productivity, and marking things off lists.

I'm also realizing that I'm going to have to be incredibly disciplined about how I use my time, and that I will definitely need to make sure to carve out time for rest.

It'll be an interesting month!  I'm curious to see how it goes.

So...today...

So today:

• I'm feeling slightly revived after one of the better sleeps I've had in several weeks
• I'm spending the morning with a friend, having coffee and catching up
• I need to study Greek and Latin word bases in preparation for a quiz tomorrow
• I have a job interview
• I'm wearing a necklace that I really like
• I'm praying for house church tonight, and for the friend who I asked to come as a guest speaker/teacher for the evening.
• I'm thinking about some laughable moments that may ensue
• I'll be applying for several more jobs
• I'm hoping the sun is out (I live in a basement, and I haven't seen outside yet)
• I'm scraping through my closet, trying to find job interview appropriate clothing.  My student wardrobe consists of a lot of jeans and hoodies.  I haven't exactly used a lot of my office employee wardrobe in the last year.
• I'm thinking about how every time I do eagle pose (the arm part, more than the leg part) in a yoga class, I end up sore the next day, because it stretches and pulls the parts of my shoulders and upper back that remain tight and sensitive, over a year after the car accident that injured them.
• For the moment anyway, I'm mostly smiling

My Person(s)

This scene from one of the first season's of Grey's Anatomy is sort of a classic:




"You're my person." It's that moment when the friendship was cemented into family.  Into the sort of thing where this is the person with whom you are most yourself.

Recently, as I was fumbling for words to describe a friendship to someone else, she, hearing my description, summed it up, "She's your person."  I had to laugh at this blatant reference to what she didn't even know was my favorite television show.  It was the perfect summation.

I have two persons.  Two people with whom I feel totally free to simply be.  The ones I know I can trust and lean on in the hard times, and the ones who I know will be the first to celebrate with me when the great times come.  They're the ones I email or text when I've had a great steak dinner, or come across something random that made me think of a moment we shared.  They're the ones I email with prayer requests, or funny quotes, or anything in between.  We talk about television shows, our families, about life and faith and travel and books.  And, since neither one lives in the same country as me (and one not even usually on the same continent as me), they're the ones I hang out with via Skype and phone calls.

Except today.  Today I am spending the day in the mountains with one of my people.  She's in town for a brief visit, and I commandeered her for an entire day.  We have some fabulous plans that I'll share later on in the day or maybe tomorrow.  Basically we're just going to enjoy spending an entire day in each others company.

In this case, since it is the person who is generally on a different continent, half-way around the world, I'm keenly aware that it will likely be several years before we get to see each other in person again, so my plan is simply to savor the moments.  To make some really fabulous memories doing a few new things, and some we've done often.  To take photos and laugh.  To talk about the important stuff that just hasn't quite fit into our phone calls or skype dates.  To just be. 

I'm so incredibly thankful for this chance to escape Calgary and spend some in person time with "my person".  And I can't wait to see what sorts of fun adventures and blessings our time together will hold!

Weekend To Do's

Just because I feel the need to write this stuff down, somewhere, preferably public, because I have a thing about saying publicly that I'm going to do something and then not doing it, that tends to lend to actually accomplishing the items on my list:

• yoga workout at home on Friday
• yoga class on Saturday
• bake an Almond Joy Cake using the recipe a friend who knows me well sent my way
• go to the post office to get student loan documents processed
• finish reading and write a review for my latest booksneeze book
• make significant headway on, if not finish, making notes on a reading project I completed a while back
• budgeting
• finish up the Greek assignments for this week
• update my resume and apply for some jobs
• watch the newest episode of Grey's Anatomy and transcribe the monologue
• watch the newest episode of Private Practice
• do some online research to create a term paper topic/thesis statement for one of my history classes (is it bad that I'm leaning towards choosing a topic solely because there's a Monty Python quote that I'd like to work into the paper?)
• Finish up the reading from this week for my random introduction to social sciences class
• Make some progress on reading the latest travel memoir I'm tackling - I have a time limit on this one since it's borrowed from the library.
• Attend a ladies gathering with some women from my house church and other house churches

Those are the big things.  A couple of them are totally flexible.  Some of them absolutely have to get done.  But really, I'd like to manage some productivity and get most if not all of these done over the course of this afternoon, evening, tomorrow and Sunday.

10:10 am Thursday

It's 10:10 am on Thursday morning as I sit to write this post.

I'm still in my pajamas, still in bed.

I have, however, had breakfast, and spent 45 minutes with my SAD lamp.  (I like that lamp - I really think that starting my day with it every morning, while I'm still in bed, just puttering online, is making a difference.)

By 11:00 I will be at a bus stop, waiting to head to mom and dad's for the day.

Because that is what I do on days when I am not attending class.  Because their house is a better place for puttering than the one in which I technically live.

Today needs to be a productive day, full of things like making a budget (read: how little income can I actually survive on?), updating a resume (read: I realized the other day after applying for several jobs, that my most recent Christmas stint at the charity isn't there, and it should be), applying for jobs (read: money is dwindling and I need to be able to pay rent), and doing greek homework (there's nothing to read into this, greek homework is just, well, greek homework.)

In between though, there are things to look forward to:

• There is a skype call this afternoon with one of my favorite people on the planet - one of the ones with whom I laugh most easily
• There is making dinner - another new recipe to try.  Chicken and portobello mushroom paninnis.  (And, a sweet friend who knows me very well sent me a recipe for "Almond Joy Cake" - that is going to be a project for this weekend!)
• There is house church tonight, which, upon consideration, holds all it's usual promise of friends and laughter, and perhaps the promise of just a bit more laughter than usual tonight.
• And there are weekend things - things like new episodes of Grey's Anatomy and Private Practice which will air tonight and be online for me to enjoy tomorrow night.
• Oh, and a superbowl party on Sunday.  Not that I have any enjoyment of football, but, well, Green Bay is playing, and I wouldn't be the daughter of a Wisconsin farm-girl if I didn't at least pretend to be interested.  Plus, there will be VERY good food there.  I know who's cooking and they're the real reason I'll be attending!

And, with that, it's probably time to pull myself out of bed, so I make that bus, and can kick off the "need to be productive" part of my day!

See you tonight for the Daily 5!

First Monday, New Decade

Well now, with a pretentious title like that, how can this post go anywhere?

Actually, I'm just thinking again this morning about newness, and wondering what this year and decade are going to hold.

I woke from dreams this morning that made me smile.  And dreams that stirred prayer.  And dreams that surprised me in what they contained - people and places I wouldn't have expected.

This is the week that I'll find out if I've been accepted into the nursing program for January entry.  The week that I'll either come off of the waiting list, or I won't.  I'll be in school either way, it's just that taking classes as a nursing student would be my preferred outcome.

I'm mentally planning my week as I sit here, too.

Tonight my parents and I are trying a new "cult following" burger chain from the states that has made it's way to Canada.

Tomorrow afternoon I'm skyping with one of my best friends.  Tomorrow night I'm meeting another dear friend for dinner and a chance to chat and catch up.

Wednesday night I know that I'm cooking dinner at mom and dad's, and Thursday night house church starts back up.

This afternoon I have errands to do.  A stop at the library, probably a trip to walmart.  I need boring things like deodorant, and a neck pillow.  (The neck pillow that has been my soreness savior that I purchased for $2 at a local dollar store wasn't all that sturdy it turns out.  I've repaired it twice already, and now I'm ready to just buy something with quality that I won't have to stitch shut every couple of weeks.)

I read this post at Donald Miller's blog this morning, and remembered reading the story of the Scott Street Parade in his book "A Million Miles in a Thousand Years."  I choked up a little watching the video in the post, when I spotted the smiling and waving parade queen and remembered the story in the book about how they choose a special woman from the street each year to be appreciated as the parade queen.  Reading the post made me think again about how story was my "one word" for last year, and how it's become an overarching theme to my dreaming and hoping and planning.  It reminded me, too, that I want to give "A Million Miles" another read through sometime in the coming month.

This post at Stuff Christians Like made me laugh this morning too.  Yes, I'm one of those people who is doing the read through the Bible in a year thing this year.  I particularly enjoyed tip # 6: "Start mentally preparing for Leviticus.That book will break you. I promise. Unless you have some very specific questions about mold. It’s a beautiful book, but 87% of all read through the Bible plans jump the sea cow right here. (That will make sense once you get to Leviticus.)"  I've bailed on at least a couple of read through the Bible plans because I got stuck in Leviticus.  So, I'm taking his advice and mentally preparing myself now.  (And grinning at the very idea of that!)

So, on the agenda this week (other than the aforementioned things):

• hang out with dad and do errands with him, stuff he needs to do to get ready for his next trip leading a team to Ghana (he leaves in less than a week)
• create a plan for cleaning and purging stuff at home, and follow through
• catch up on a number of blog posts I've been meaning to write about books I read (many of the books I read when I was doing all that bus reading, before starting my contract job)
• and speaking of bus reading, get one or two sessions of that in (Like I said, I want to make another trip through "A Million Miles in a Thousand Years", and I've got a few other books on the agenda)
• Listen to the audio book I spent months waiting for at the library
• tackle a few little nagging administrative tasks (like product registrations, and some changes to my cell phone plan)

Not perhaps the most glowingly auspicious way to start a new decade, but for me, the stuff of day to day life, the accomplishing of the little things is what lets me tell a better story with my days.  Having a list and tackling it.  Planning the fun moments too.  These are important in my life.

So, those are my plans, what's on your agenda for starting out this decade?

Tomorrow Thoughts

I'm sitting here, staring at the remnants of today's "to do" list and pondering what I would like tomorrow to hold.

Tomorrow will hopefully hold these things:

• another loop on the bus, riding, reading, thinking, praying
• baking cookies.  I have a recipe for cookies with banana and pecans and chocolate chunks that I've been waiting to try
• if it's chilly and cold again, it might hold a bubble bath - soaking and warming up while reading
• writing a birthday card for a friend, and popping it in the mail so that it hopefully arrives overseas on time
• catching up on some blog posting and scheduling I've been planning.
• making some notes on one of the books I read last week
• cooking dinner - at least that's the currently scheduled plan.

How to Fill a Day that Doesn't Hold an Escape

Every so often my parents very justifiably ask for a day when I don't invade their home in an effort to escape the crazy living realities of my own place of residence.  They need a day off and time to themselves too.  They generally give me a few days notice that on such and such a day, I need to make other plans.

Today is one of those days.

I've learned to make lists.  I spent a vast portion of yesterday jotting things down every few minutes or hours, as one sort of "oh, I should get that done" or other would cross my mind.  The list has far more on it than I can realistically accomplish in a day, but that's kind of the point. 

Options are important on the days when it is harder to escape the place I reside.  On the days where I can't just set up camp somewhere else with ease.

I came home last night and rearranged furniture, too.  The dvd drive on my laptop has been dying a slow death for a while now, and seems to have finally given up entirely.  That was having a serious impact on my ability to watch dvds while reclined on my bed.  I fixed that problem last night with a little bit of rearranging.  I moved my television and dvd player to someplace where I can see them while comfortably reclined.

I hung my map of the world back up last night, too, and began the process of sticking pictures of people I love and pray for up around the map.  I hung that where I can see it from my bed too.  (I spend a lot of my evenings sitting on my bed, propped up against the headboard, especially since I sold my couch and loveseat before my last move.)  One of the things I loved about the home of the friend I stayed with in California was that there were pictures of the important people in her life everywhere in her home.  I hadn't bothered to hang much of my art, or even to get new photos printed since I moved in here.  It was survival mode, and I figured why bother hanging stuff if I wasn't going to be staying?  But, I'm still unemployed, and I still don't know about school, and I can't make decisions about moving until those things are sorted out.  So, I'm going to get pictures printed, and put them up around the map.  I want the people I love around me right now, reminding me that I love and am loved in return.

Other things on my list of possibilities for a day that doesn't contain an easy escape include things like filling out Canadian and American passport paperwork, doing yoga, painting my toenails, attacking a mound of filing of important papers that I've essentially ignored for the last couple of months, just adding papers to the pile, reviewing my latest booksneeze freebie (a dvd this time), working on a new project I've been doing, calling my bank, making a pot of tea, doing some reading, sorting and cleaning and purging, trying a teeth whitening sample I recently ordered, stitching up a hole in something, and sewing on a button, watching some television on dvd, taking some photos of my crazy living situation, doing some exercises from a book I'm reading, and ordering photos to be printed online.

And, I'm going to head out to a store called 10,000 Villages.  It's a fabulous store, and I'm looking for a couple small, colorful, items to bring a larger taste of the world I can't afford to travel to right now, to my living space.  Things that will add life and color and warmth to this odd place that I inhabit.

I told you there was too much to do.  But the options are helpful.  It means I can evaluate what I feel like doing, instead of just having to pick something from a list I'm not excited about, for the sake of keeping busy.

And with that, I'm going to crawl out of bed long enough to grab the muffin I set aside for breakfast, the supplements that need to be swallowed with that breakfast, and then I'll eventually get up and walk to 10,000 Villages, thus getting some exercise in as well! 

I'm off to begin the process of filling a day that doesn't have an easy escape... I'm sure it will be an adventure all it's own!