Mountains

When you live in the part of the world I live in, it's fairly inevitable that you spend at least some time in the mountains as you're growing up.

I've always loved the mountains - I learned to meet God in creation when I spent time in them. Even during the years of depression, a day of hiking, or simply driving and spending time in the mountains could lift my spirits.

Until recently. The last couple of trips I've made out to the mountains have been pretty hard on me. And suddenly, I've had absolutely no desire to be in the places my heart has loved for years. In fact, the times have been so hard on me that I've been afraid to be in the mountains - wondering if it was simply the atmosphere of the places I visited that made it so difficult to enjoy what I'd always loved.

I'm going to the mountains today. And to be honest, I'm dreading it a bit. I'm serving as the driver of a rental car that will take myself, one of my roommate's, and a houseguest who's been staying with us for about a week to the mountains. Those of you who know me well will know that the fact that I'm driving is making it that much harder for me to do this.

But I'm going to do it. And I'm hopefully going to meet with Jesus. They're planning a two hour hike that my energy levels right now won't allow me to do. So I'll be sitting in the car and sleeping or reading. Or sitting in a hotel by a beautiful mountain lake and sipping tea and writing, or (if the weather permits) simply sitting by the lake.

I don't like being afraid of the places my heart loves.

So, as much as I'm laying here in bed, getting ready to get up and go pick up the rental car, and fighting panic, I'm going to do this.