Navel Gazing

So, I hung out with my friend Rae today, and followed through on something I've been quietly thinking about for a number of months. I really wasn't sure until the moment it happened that I'd go through with it, but I did.

I got my navel pierced.

Which, I suppose, is bringing a whole new meaning to the idea of "navel gazing" for a little while. Especially since I need to clean the piercing 3-6 times a day to prevent infection.

The girl who did my piercing was great. Quite funny, and we learned some new things. Things like, if you tense up, it's actually way harder for her to pierce - she says it can be like trying to push the needle through rock. She also told us a funny story about a girl whose tongue she pierced recently, who showed up the next day telling her she needed to take the piercing out - she couldn't have it for her work! (Our question was, a tongue piercing isn't visible unless you open your mouth quite wide, so how did her work find out??)

(And by the way, if you're going to have piercings done, it's definitely a bonus to have the sort of friend that Rae is to tag along with you. The artist, also pierced, collects tattoos from the countries she visits, and hides them creatively with jewelry to continue her job as a flight attendant sort of friend!)

Rae and I went out for lunch afterwards, and wandered through this fantastic stationery store that she used to work at and I've never been to before. (I bought three journals for future use - the company that makes my current favorite journal has done a few upgrades and made them even more perfect!) We also checked out this fabulous clothing shop in Kensington that I'm definitely going back to the next time I have some spare spending money. It sells mostly clothing made and designed by a local Calgary designer. The coolest part is that she travels to India and buys old saris and silks, and then brings them home and makes them into these beautiful, bohemian, colorful dresses, tops, skirts and bags. And, unlike most of your "typical" local designers and semi-upscale boutiques, these were totally in affordable price ranges. And so up my alley with the beautiful colors and bohemian flowy look of the dresses in particular.

I love both of the two photos below. The first is just me, at the restaurant, the second Rae snapped kind of sneakily, when I was pausing for the first time to actually check out what I'd had done! I was feeling full of joy in those moments. That hasn't been a common thing lately, but today I felt alive and joyful.

When I pierced my nose, I did it to mark a significant moment of God's healing in my life.

This piercing is more about hope and joy and life. About moving into a new season. About learning to love myself and be okay in my own skin. I haven't made it to all of those goals yet, (and some days they seem hopelessly far away) but now I have a "sparkly thing" to remind me to choose life and hope and joy on a daily basis.

Angry Conversations With God

I finished this book "Angry Conversations With God" last night, and wrote the following review for facebook:

Definitely one of the better books I've read in a long time. And who can't help but fall in love with a book that says the things we're all thinking about our conversations with God, and then points out that maybe, just maybe, we've made God in our own image instead of the opposite way around, and perhaps it might be time to divorce this "false god" in favor of the real deal.

I was delighted to be left hopeful, without a completely perfect storybook ending, and equally thrilled to discover that someone else out there has snarky conversations with the creator of the universe!

Let me just say this... I laughed the whole way through this book. The whole way. In the midst of a time while she was struggling, someone gave the author a copy of "The Sacred Romance" and reminded her that her relationship with God was like a marriage. Isaacs responded by commenting that if that was the case, then she and God needed marriage counseling. And then she followed through, by taking God to therapy with her. And I laughed the whole way through.

What I didn't quite expect was to encounter so much of my own journey of the last several years in her words. To need, as I said in the review above, to consider the ways in which I've perhaps created God in my own image, rather than the other way around, and to consider that it might be time for me to let God simply be God, rather than saddling him with my own images and expectations.

I'll leave you with a few lines (mostly from towards the end of the book) that really caught me, some for the way they made me laugh, and others for the way they made me think, and challenged my heart:

The worship band played their usual 7/11 songs (seven words repeated eleven times). (pg. 210)

I saw now all too clearly why I had married God: for the power and the glory. For the money. I was a spiritual gold digger. It is a chilling moment when your soul is laid bare in front of God: the real God who is wiser and fairer, more loving, and, yes, holier than thou. He owed me no apology. I thought of Job's words: "I spoke of things I did not understand...I despise myself and repent in dust and ashes" (Job 42:3,6). (pg. 220)

If God really was good, then I had to let go of every expectation and every grudge. I could no longer defy him or manipulate him. I might even have to let him love me. (pg. 224)

A new sense of freedom was born into my life. A dark, beautiful freedom that came when everything was swept away and I was still there. I was still alive. (pg. 233)

God torched my life, and it's the best thing that ever happened to me. But I don't like to say that too often. You know, in case he gets any snarky ideas. (pg. 238)

The Jungle Test...

Did this quiz on blogthings today, and the results were semi-true and made me smile.

You Are Dramatic

You are colorful and charismatic. You get and hold people's attention. Right now, you are seeking peace and tranquility in your life. You are drawn to people who are innocent and pure of heart. You feel like there is nothing in your life that needs to be changed. You take time before you react. You allow yourself to explore your options.

The Jungle Test

In the News...

It's been a while since I linked to any headlines, but here are a couple that caught my attention this morning...

Mexican Nursery Fire Kills Many

Deadly Clashes in Peru's Amazon

D-Day, Snow, and other early morning thoughts

Today is the 65th anniversary of D-Day. Take just a moment to stop and remember the sacrifice of those soldiers all those years ago. And just a moment to be thankful.

It's snowing. Actual white stuff accumulating on the grass. Thankfully not accumulating very much, but still, it's snowing. I blame my dad. When he goes to Africa, we unfailingly get snow. (It's true that he usually goes in January, when snow is a bit more expected, but still...)

Two days ago, it was 74 degrees (F) in our house, and we had the furnace basically turned off. Today, the furnace is running once every hour or two to maintain a temperature of 70 degrees.

I slept oddly last night. There was a decision resting rather heavily on my mind, and I woke at different points with totally different opinions on which way it would go. At the moment I'm feeling quite peaceful about the direction I think it's going to go.

I finished a fantastic book last night. Sometime this weekend I'll be writing a review of sorts on it and sharing it here.

I'm still loving M*A*S*H*. I'm almost through season 5. (I own all 11 seasons on DVD.) I often play it in the background as I'm cleaning, or cooking, or sometimes just as I'm puttering around on the internet.

I just looked to see if there were any good kids cartoons on this morning. Didn't the deal used to be that cartoons started nice and early on Saturday morning, to keep you busy and quiet until mom and dad were ready to get up and start the day? Almost no channels have kids shows this morning, and the ones that do have titles like "Raspberry Jazzberry Jam". The Care Bears are on at 9:30. Maybe I'll watch them, just for old times sake. We used to watch The Care Bears at around noon every day when we were home schooled. The Care Bears, and Inspector Gadget. Those were quality entertainment.

And with that, I'm either going to go find a book to read, or take a nice long shower and start getting ready for the day. I've got some fun plans, as long as my decision making skills don't flip-flop yet again!

More later...