A few years ago I found myself unexpectedly without any ducks to line up. My job was gone, and a new journey seemed in order. I'm just entering (having finished the schooling) a new career as a nurse, and I’m dreaming about the new journeys that will open to me. A pierced nose, wearing scarves often and still dreaming of traveling the world, writing in European coffee shops, praying in South American ruins, and living somewhere warm enough to wear skirts with flip flops or really cute shoes year round remain high on my list of priorities! These days that warm place I'm dreaming about is Florida... maybe someday I'll escape my cold Canadian home for warmer climes!
I started reading Alece's blog sometime early in the year. I can't remember how I found her, but I can tell you why I kept going back. She writes with a great honesty about being broken. A deep honesty and questioning that still reflects a trust in God, even when He can't seem to be found. There have been days where simply reading Alece's words have encouraged me to keep walking out my own crazy, messy journey.
Last week, another blogger hosted "Ladies Week" and shared videos of a number of female bloggers sharing their stories of brokenness and meeting God somewhere in the midst of that. I found "Ladies Week" because Alece wrote a post that linked to it, and to a video of herself sharing her story.
This video, actually:
I cannot begin to explain how deeply this encouraged me when I saw it first, and how I've watched it several times since and been encouraged each time.
Sometimes as I share what's gone on and is going on in my life with people around me, I struggle. It's pretty messy, this year of deconstruction and working again towards healing. It's not even a new journey. I've done this whole "need to piece large chunks of my life back together" journey before, and I haven't been all that impressed to be walking it out again.
But the reminder that sometimes we need to be authentic in the midst of the crap, not just afterwards, was one I needed to hear again. To be authentic in more than just the "past tense." I needed to hear someone else who understands what it is to walk out brokenness (though our stories are so different) share how sometimes the "grit" of life is the thing God uses most powerfully to minister to someone else. I needed the reminder to find people with whom I can be really and truly authentic - who I can trust with what's going on in me, and trust to pray and walk with me in the hard stuff and not just the stuff that looks pretty.
I needed the encouragement of Alece's story, and I hope it encourages each of you as well.
