This was just a very hard day.
So I went shopping. Bought a new stud (purple!) to put in my nose piercing and a few other little things.
Retail therapy helped a little.
Wandering in the mall by myself, not having to make eye contact or talk with anyone about anything more serious than paying for my purchases and the bad weather we're having.
And I was hungry, so I'm eating. A grilled cheese sandwich. Because that's what I was craving.
Heading for bed soon. Praying for restful sleep.
Good night.
Friday, April 18, 2008
I'm Trying... (turn your eyes)
This is one of those days where I'm getting bombarded by the waves of emotion.
Where I feel as if I'm drowning.
I'm working on making it until the work day ends without crying. It's my major goal for the day.
When I get home tonight, to my empty house, I fully expect the tears to come.
I'm still haunted by this. It's stronger again today.
The sky is absolutely dumping snow.
I'm losing hope that winter will ever end. (in nature, or, more metaphorically, in me.)
I'm reminded of this hymn again. I'm weary and troubled, and light is nowhere to be seen.
(Turn Your Eyes and See His)
I'm trying to get there. Trying to trust that it's true.
O soul, are you weary and troubled?
No light in the darkness you see?
There’s light for a look at the Savior,
And life more abundant and free!
Refrain:
Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
Look full in His wonderful face,
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim,
In the light of His glory and grace.
Through death into life everlasting
He passed, and we follow Him there;
O’er us sin no more hath dominion—
For more than conquerors we are!
His Word shall not fail you—He promised;
Believe Him, and all will be well:
Then go to a world that is dying,
His perfect salvation to tell!
Where I feel as if I'm drowning.
I'm working on making it until the work day ends without crying. It's my major goal for the day.
When I get home tonight, to my empty house, I fully expect the tears to come.
I'm still haunted by this. It's stronger again today.
The sky is absolutely dumping snow.
I'm losing hope that winter will ever end. (in nature, or, more metaphorically, in me.)
I'm reminded of this hymn again. I'm weary and troubled, and light is nowhere to be seen.
(Turn Your Eyes and See His)
I'm trying to get there. Trying to trust that it's true.
O soul, are you weary and troubled?
No light in the darkness you see?
There’s light for a look at the Savior,
And life more abundant and free!
Refrain:
Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
Look full in His wonderful face,
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim,
In the light of His glory and grace.
Through death into life everlasting
He passed, and we follow Him there;
O’er us sin no more hath dominion—
For more than conquerors we are!
His Word shall not fail you—He promised;
Believe Him, and all will be well:
Then go to a world that is dying,
His perfect salvation to tell!
Friday
I’m so glad it’s Friday.
I’m not having a particularly good day. It’s a “Thursday in Rome” sort of day. I know that doesn’t mean anything to the broader world, but it’s the best way I can think of to describe what I’m experiencing.
So, I’m glad it’s Friday.
I like Friday’s.
In spite of the schizophrenic weather we’re having. Last night I wore flip-flops and a t-shirt and a light weight windbreaker to go out grocery shopping. This morning, to get to work I wore a hoodie, a long sleeve t-shirt, a polar fleece jacket, and my down vest, with a toque and gloves. They’re predicting 10 cm of snow by the end of the day, and snow every day for the next 4-5 days.
Here are some of the reasons that Friday is my favorite day of the week.
It’s the last work day.
It’s always more laid back in the work arena.
It’s casual day. I love wearing jeans to the office.
I have a weekly Subway lunch date with a coworker. We look forward to it all week.
I love Friday evenings. My roommate is always out. Our house is empty, quiet, peaceful. Doesn’t matter what I do – talking on the phone to a friend, reading, watching a movie, taking a long bath – I love the quiet of my house on Friday evening after a full and stressful week.
So, here’s to the fact that there’s only 7 hours left until I get to Friday evening. And that I have an hour for lunch somewhere in there, and that, in spite of the weather, I’m wearing comfy jeans.
I’m not having a particularly good day. It’s a “Thursday in Rome” sort of day. I know that doesn’t mean anything to the broader world, but it’s the best way I can think of to describe what I’m experiencing.
So, I’m glad it’s Friday.
I like Friday’s.
In spite of the schizophrenic weather we’re having. Last night I wore flip-flops and a t-shirt and a light weight windbreaker to go out grocery shopping. This morning, to get to work I wore a hoodie, a long sleeve t-shirt, a polar fleece jacket, and my down vest, with a toque and gloves. They’re predicting 10 cm of snow by the end of the day, and snow every day for the next 4-5 days.
Here are some of the reasons that Friday is my favorite day of the week.
It’s the last work day.
It’s always more laid back in the work arena.
It’s casual day. I love wearing jeans to the office.
I have a weekly Subway lunch date with a coworker. We look forward to it all week.
I love Friday evenings. My roommate is always out. Our house is empty, quiet, peaceful. Doesn’t matter what I do – talking on the phone to a friend, reading, watching a movie, taking a long bath – I love the quiet of my house on Friday evening after a full and stressful week.
So, here’s to the fact that there’s only 7 hours left until I get to Friday evening. And that I have an hour for lunch somewhere in there, and that, in spite of the weather, I’m wearing comfy jeans.
The Spirit Will Speak in Us - Henri Nouwen
More from Henri Nouwen
The Spirit Will Speak in Us
When we are spiritually free, we do not have to worry about what to say or do in unexpected, difficult circumstances. When we are not concerned about what others think of us or what we will get for what we do, the right words and actions will emerge from the center of our beings because the Spirit of God, who makes us children of God and sets us free, will speak and act through us.
Jesus says: "When you are handed over, do not worry about how to speak or what to say; what you are to say will be given to you when the time comes, because it is not you who will be speaking; the Spirit of your Father will be speaking in you" (Matthew 10:19-20).
Let's keep trusting the Spirit of God living within us, so that we can live freely in a world that keeps handing us over to judges and evalutators.
The Spirit Will Speak in Us
When we are spiritually free, we do not have to worry about what to say or do in unexpected, difficult circumstances. When we are not concerned about what others think of us or what we will get for what we do, the right words and actions will emerge from the center of our beings because the Spirit of God, who makes us children of God and sets us free, will speak and act through us.
Jesus says: "When you are handed over, do not worry about how to speak or what to say; what you are to say will be given to you when the time comes, because it is not you who will be speaking; the Spirit of your Father will be speaking in you" (Matthew 10:19-20).
Let's keep trusting the Spirit of God living within us, so that we can live freely in a world that keeps handing us over to judges and evalutators.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
