Conglomeration

I didn't sob when my mom showed up and hugged me.

I did cry again once she left.

I'm probably 60% packed now. The vast majority of my possessions are books, and we packed about 18 boxes worth of those tonight, powering quickly through three large bookshelves and one small one.

In my head I'm feeling less stressed about this move than I was earlier. But the rest of me hasn't caught on yet.

I think we're taking possession of the new place on Wednesday night, and will move a load or two that night, and another load or two on Thursday night.

I follow a blog with photos of Rome, and came across this post the other night. If memory serves, it's taken very near where we stayed in Rome, and, despite the many things that have come from that trip, it was somehow a hopeful thing for me to see. A hopeful memory.

I've also been following my friend LP/CA's updates on her current travels. Looking at her photos and hearing her stories have once again re-awakened my travel itch. I think I'll just tuck myself into her carry-on bag the next time she travels and tag along! Or maybe I'll spring for an airplane ticket!

I'm tentatively hoping to get outside of the city on Sunday, post moving crazyness. I'm feeling the smothering of the city again, and need to find some time alone and away from Calgary for a few hours. I'm not sure George is up to it, but I think I'll head out anyway.

And with that, I think I'm going to curl up for a while and read some Psalms, and maybe journal just a bit. The tears are still flowing every few minutes, and I need to rest. I think I'll be in bed within the hour.

Meltdown

My mom called me mid-afternoon today, and I lost it. Just melted into a puddle of sobs right there where I was sitting. It's been building for a while, the combination of exhaustion and stress and loneliness. And, upon hearing my mom's voice, after just completing a particularly trying call with a utility company, I couldn't contain it any more.

(And, just as an aside, no matter how good they make it sound, don't EVER use Telus TV. Their service is less than stellar and has quite a few hidden stipulations that are currently making my moving life even more complicated than it needs to be.)

I cried for quite a while, and the tears are still very close to the surface (so close they well up behind my eyes if I even admit that they're there.)

Mom is coming over shortly to spend an hour helping me pack. An hour is all I have the energy for. My throat is still sore, I'm still feeling quite listless, I've got a headache, and I'm fairly certain I'm also running a fever.

I'm pretty sure I'll melt again as soon as I see her. But the plus side is that I'll get to collect a hug. I haven't had enough of those lately. And the people I'd really like to collect them from live too far away for that to be a regular occurrence, so I'll take what I can get.

Horizontal

I went to work for an hour this morning, to take care of some things that absolutely had to be done today.

The cold/flu symptoms I was experiencing yesterday seem to have intensified overnight.

I'm spending the rest of the day horizontal, in my nice dark bedroom, either sleeping, or just waking from sleep, or just going back to sleep.

More thoughts later, perhaps, when I'm concious.