What I'm Thinking About (in no particular order)

There are a lot of seemingly random things on my mind at the moment, and I thought I'd take a stab at writing them down here before I head to bed. (And can I just say that I am absolutely in love with whichever genius made it possible for me to be laying in bed, typing a blog post on my laptop, which is connected to the wider world via a wireless connection...)

I've been thinking about those people who challenge my concept of what it means to live simply. I've been impacted again this week by Shane Claiborne and the Simple Way community in Philadelphia. Their home burnt to the ground last week in a seven alarm fire that started in an abandoned factory across the street. Several other homes in the community were also destroyed. If you go to their website you can watch a great video, showing footage of the fire, and find opportunities to donate money and help rebuild. You can find the website here.

I've been thinking about the times when it seems impossible to make a just choice. I was reminded this week that the little things count. I work for Mennonites. Because of their justice loving, and pacifist nature, when I chose the funds that the company will invest my RRSP contributions into, I had the option to choose what they call ethical investments. So I did. This means that my money is not supporting tobacco companies, and more importantly, that it is not supporting armament manufacturers.

I read a powerful book this week. The story of some guys about my age who travelled from the Southernmost tip of Africa to Egypt, primarily via dirt bikes. The story of what the author learned about himself over the course of the journey. It is ultimately a story of faith in the face of unspeakable tragedy, and I greatly enjoyed it. I also liked that the publishers allowed the story to not resolve - that they honored the questions instead of rushing for answers. The title? It's called "The Only Road North" and is by a guy named Erik Mirandette.

I watched a fun movie with Megs tonight. "Ratatouille". Very fun. A kids movie, but with lots of enjoyable humor and a feel good message about living to the fullness of who you are.

Ben and Jerry's makes a great raspberry sorbet. This is important news. Especially since it doesn't contain milk or milk extracts. I can eat as much of this as I want without paying for it in stomach ailments for the next three days.

Work was nearly unbearable today. Everyone was grouchy and stressed and it seemed to be catching. It was however, my weekly Subway lunch day with one of my coworkers and that as always was enjoyable.

I start moving on Monday. I started packing last night. Books mostly so far. I think I have five or six boxes of books packed, and two more bookcases left to empty.

I'm loving the music that Jacob and Lily are making these days. I listen to their album at least once ever couple days at work. I think I played it three times in a row this afternoon, since it was making me smile with fond memories, and was helping me work to avoid catching the grumpy mood floating around the office.

I'm going to do some more packing tomorrow, some church admin work, maybe watch a movie, do some errands, drive T. to and from work, and just generally hang out and enjoy a quiet house - I love when the house is empty.

I'm doing the Stampede thing in a big way this year, because my new roommate only gets one shot at it in the year she's here, and wants to see everything. So we're going to the cheap "sneak-a-peek" night - $3 admission, and Jann Arden is playing the Coke Stage. I like Jann Arden. We're also going to see the rodeo on the first Saturday afternoon, and the Grandstand show on a yet to be determined evening, as well as touring the barns, exhibits and grounds. I'm excited for the rodeo, not so much for the grandstand show, but think it'll be a good time.

I think I've found a Bible study group to hang out with for the next while. They eat together one meeting a month, make it a priority to be together every week in various people's homes, worship, pray and study the Word together. I like that. I like that right now there's no formal "pastor" figure. I like that these are simply people who have made it a priority to spend time together in the presence of God each week.


I am loving sending real mail these days. Send me you're mailing address and you'll get a card! Probably a funny card, as I have a slightly twisted sense of humor. I bought one the other day that was captioned "Amish Road Rage" - you can picture the scenes depicted.

And with that, I think I'm going to read for a bit and head to bed...

See you around!

"Special" Birthday

There are lots of things I could talk to you about today.

I could tell you that I’ve arbitrarily declared today to be December 1, because the two inches (and still coming down) of snow we have is acceptable for December 1, but in my opinion is completely not acceptable for April 20th.

I could tell you how glad I am for a cup of passion tea this morning.

I could tell you about eating pizza with Megs last night, and starting to watch a movie, getting twenty minutes in and turning it off and going shopping instead. (I can’t even tell you the title of the movie, because I’ve forgotten it. It was crude, dirty, had David Duchovny and Julianne Moore and Maggie Gyllenhal and someone else, and sounded so inoccuous on the back cover that neither one of us remembered to look at the rating or the comments that go with the rating. Can I just say that I have an incredibly bad track record of picking independent or lesser known movies – the ones I pick are almost invariably BAD. So if you’re ever watching a movie like that with me, don’t let me pick!)

I could tell you about the attitudes I was raised with, the ones I was thinking about on the way to work this morning as I slogged through the snow from the train station. The ones that say that spiritual warfare is something that only happens in lesser developed countries. The ones that say that poverty is something I should care about if it’s a starving African child, because they can’t help themselves, but something I should look down on if it’s a north-american street person, because really, why don’t they just get it together and find a job?

Or, now that I’ve got those other things out of my system, I could tell you why April 20 is a special day for me. I think I’ll just go ahead and do that.

You see, 19 years ago today, I knelt down on the dirty chocolate brown shag carpet that was then in our living room (can you say 1970’s leftovers!?) beside my mom, and, in the simplistic language that a four year old uses, “asked Jesus into my life.”

My parents made a big deal out of this. They made a big deal out of reminding us every year, honoring this choice, the commitment we’d made. They’d remind us, even when we forgot about our “special birthday” (which we also called our “spiritual birthday”). We had a special dinner plate that we used to use for special occasions. I don’t remember exactly what all was on it, but it was blue and white, and I remember that it said “you are loved” on the rim somewhere. Basically, it showed up for each of us two or three times a year, on our actual birthday, on our “special” birthday, and maybe when something really exciting happened. My parents believed in celebrating our unique accomplishments and special occasions.

I resented April 20 for a number of years. All those years of depression, when I was praying that God would simply release me from the “unknowing” commitment I made at age four. I was begging God to let go of me, because it seemed that all I’d ever had from him was pain. If he wasn’t going to let me go, I told him, then just let me die, because I was done living.

Last year, my healing was new, and I was embroiled in the midst of caring for some very “messy” people, handling some messy stuff in my own life, and job hunting, and April 20th passed without notice or incident.

But today, I’m grateful. I’m grateful to the four year-old me, the simple faith that handed my life to Jesus. I’m grateful in hindsight for all the years that Jesus walked with me, through pain and depression and suffering. And I’m grateful for my relationship with him today. I’m grateful that I can say that I’ve known Jesus and even tried to walk with him for most of the last nineteen years. I’m grateful for the healing he’s brought. I’m grateful for the deep heart knowledge of his love for me. And so, inside me today, I’m celebrating. I’m reveling in a significant moment. I’m enjoying my “special birthday.” And I’m passing birthday wishes on to you. May you know Christ, be found in him, not having a rightousness of your own that comes from the law, but a righteousness that is through faith in him. May you know Christ, and the power of his resurrection, and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death and so somehow to attain to the resurrection of the dead. (Philippians 3).

Bono and Bill Hybels

I had a chance tonight to watch an interview that Bono did last summer with Bill Hybels for the Leadership Summit 2006. It was being shown at a local church, and my best friend was going, so I tagged along with her.

It was fantastic. If you get the chance to see it, you should. And if you know me, and would like to see it, let me know. My dad has a copy, and I'm thinking of setting up a viewing for a bunch of friends.

It was funny, profound, and even musical - basically all the things that are best about that famed Irish rock star named Bono. And it raises some beautiful questions.

My favorite line (loosely paraphrased)? "We need to stop asking God to bless what we're doing, and start looking for where he's already working and go there, because He is blessing that."