Daily 5 - Day 55

Today's daily 5:

1. A tasty hamburger at a pub for dinner
2. "real" hugs from a couple of good friends
3. laughter even when I was really too tired to properly emotionally engage
4. That Jesus loves us deeply, even in our really broken spaces, and being reminded of that today
5. feeling Jesus speak, and knowing that he is changing things in me even amidst the really hard stuff.
   

rattled...

I'm feeling pretty spent right now.

A bit hurt and angry, and in need of a session venting. My blog is definitely not the place for that today.

I've had some pretty unfair and hurtful labels and accusations thrown my way today.

It's been a long time, maybe never, since I've stood truly alone (in human terms anyway... bearing in mind that Jesus is with me) on an issue.

I'm feeling rattled, struggling a bit to concentrate, and I'm tempted to say more here than I'm certain is appropriate.

So I think I'll stop now.

I'm having tea with a long time friend after work tonight. Perhaps I'll vent a bit to her. Or maybe I'll save the venting for my journal, and just collect a hug and some laughter from her. Because I could use both today.

So...

I've had a bit of a crazy day thus far.

I did manage to get a bit of sleep. But I dreamt wildly, deeply, intensely all night long. Strong and disturbing images, leading me to pray and think and wait and wonder.

I had a long and serious conversation with my boss this morning as well. About the issues I was wrestling with on Friday and Saturday. I'm not sure yet if I'll say much more about how that conversation went. Except to say that I am both disappointed in the outcome, but completely unsurprised. I'm still praying about taking one further step. I pray that it was a conversation where I used my words to point rather than chop. I think it was, though I'm fairly certain that was not how it was received.

There have been ravens flying past my window every few minutes this morning. Perching where I can see them. There are often birds, but rarely ravens. The ravens are oddly encouraging this morning.

And with that, I have much to accomplish, and less time than usual to do it in this week, so I'd better get at it.

Daily 5 - Day 54

Today's Daily 5:

1. Being really grateful that my parents live near enough that when the mechanic I've visited because my regular mechanic is closed, and says they're busy, and it will be two-three hours of waiting to get a couple of signal light bulbs changed, I can just get him to sell me the bulbs and call dad and invite myself over and let him do the quick fix on my car.
2. Finally getting one of the remaining two bookings we needed to take care of for our trip done, and having firm plans to finish the last bit of planning on Tuesday evening.
3. Shopping for a gift for a friend, and finding something that I think will work well
4. a hug from my mom
5. Visiting the gorillas this morning
   

Slow day so far...

I hung out at the zoo for a little while this morning, mostly visiting the gorillas. They've integrated a couple of new females into the troop, and it was fun to get to see them for the first time today. The gorilla exhibit remains my peaceful place, and it was nice to be back there for the first time in probably a month.

It's snowing today, wet and cold. Not really sticking on the ground much yet, but snowing nonetheless.

L. and I have set this evening aside for finalizing some trip plans. Booking a rental car, and one night of hotel accommodation. And sorting out which of the many attractions it is that we really are making must sees. We were talking just now, before she headed out for lunch, about the things we'd like to see, and laughing over some of the possibilities.

I'm so excited to be going on a vacation. It's been incredibly long. I've already mentioned that it's been almost two years since I had more than two work days in a row off. If we're counting vacation time, it's been far longer than that. Because the last time I had time off was the trip to Malta and Europe, and a vacation that time most definitely wasn't. So, I'm really anticipating much needed time away from work, and fellowship time with dear friends. One of my favorite parts of this trip already is that L. is coming with me. I'm thrilled to have someone to make the flights east (and then back home) and I know that with her along I'll collect far more experiences than if I was alone.

I'm waiting for a phone call to be returned. I have a signal light out on George, and I need my dad's help to replace the bulb. Hopefully my parents will be home soon, and I'll be able to go over there. I have some errands that I need to do today, but I don't feel safe doing them without a left-turn signal.

So, for the moment, I think I'm going to nap until my phone rings. There is some cleaning to be done, but I remain pretty exhausted and spent from the last week, so I think I'll likely just rest.