Fuzzy... and other things

My headache isn't going away. (I may have to take another pill.) And it's making my brain functions just a little bit fuzzy.

I'm feeling relief. I've followed through on a decision, and made (at least as much as possible at this point) a commitment.

I talked to the young lady I desperately needed to track down last night. She leaves tomorrow. At least I have a way to contact her in the new city and make sure (as much as one can long distance wise) that she's okay on a weekly basis for the next while. I've got a few feelers out for resources and support for her in that city as well. I fear just a little for her - she's walking back into a situation that has in the past been threatening. Praying protection, peace, a shield and covering over her life. Praying that she would know the support of those who love her, know that she's not alone. Praying that the lies that are bombarding her would not penetrate.

I am not by nature good at long-distance crisis. I am a planner, a fixer. When something like this happens, I find myself mentally evaluating what the worst that could happen is, and then working solutions to that in my head. So this morning I've thought about phone calls from hospitals, needing to get a flight out there, wondering if another friend would travel with me, and how I would afford those things.

And then, I realize that I'm taking control again, and I find myself once again in front of Jesus, having to say, "My hands are open, take this from me. I'm not in control, and I can't fix or heal this, but you can. May your will be done. Use me or don't. Protect her life and comfort her."

I think that this is a good place to be.