Go to the land I will give you (When blessing doesn't look like blessing)

As part of Lent this year, there are two little devotional books that I have been reading in addition to my usual nightly routine of Scripture, prayer and a guided journal that was a gift from a dear friend.

Tonight, both of those booklets caught deeply at my heart, challenging and pulling at me in the midst of a number of things I've been thinking about.

The first one is simply called "Places Along the Way" and explores in a scripture reading and short reflection various places - taking you on a Lenten journey if you will. Tonight's "stop" was Ur of the Chaldees. The place from which the Lord called Abraham out into the unknown. Into a journey of trust. "Go from your country to the land that I will show you." It always surprises me that Abraham went. I'd have been asking a lot of questions. "What land, Lord? What should I bring with me? Why there instead of here?" But Abraham packed everything up and headed out.

I've felt a bit like I've been journeying in the unknown this year. Certainly in the uncertain and unexpected. And trying to learn trust along the way. To really believe that Jesus doesn't have it in for me, and that he is holding and guiding and seeking to bless me in the midst of this.

That booklet closed with the following paragraph, which hit my heart deeply:

"We go out today and tomorrow not knowing where the steps will take us. We will be tempted to become attached to the wrong places and things. We are likely to put our minds on cities without foundations, built by humans who are destined to be dust. But the Christ of promise gives us the vision and confidence to walk in faith, with eyes fixed on the permanent."

The second book is simply titled "Journeying Through Lent with Luke," and tonight's passage looked at the first two beatitudes as Luke presents them: "God blesses you who are poor, for the Kingdom of God is yours. God blesses you who are hungry now, for you will be satisfied. God blesses you who weep now, for in due time you will laugh." (Luke 6:20-21 NLT)

Again, this has been a year where I've asked big questions about the blessings of God, and so the words of the author of this little Lenten book caught at me tonight. She writes:

"Being comfortable and carefree is not what matters most in life. To be blessed is to receive God's favor, to trust God's promises, and to live in God's presence - even in the most unhappy times... Jesus' teachings turn natural expectations inside out. In Luke 6, he teaches that even the most painful situations, such as grief and poverty, may be occasions for blessing... The people most likely to be shunned and avoided are the very people to whom Jesus promises God's blessing. And the situations people most want to avoid are the very situations in which God may bless them... The comfort of the Holy Spirit is now, in the present moment, today."

huh.

If you'd been privy to the more personal things I've been thinking about the last few weeks, or even an ongoing conversation I've been having with God (and sometimes with a dear friend), you'd probably be laughing at me right now, or smiling at the way Jesus has once again chosen to make a point.

And so, I'm off to talk with Jesus again about trusting him with the journey I'm on and trusting specifically that he is indeed offering blessing. Even in the midst of some pretty gross things.