Compliments?

I was thinking yesterday about giving and receiving compliments.

I wore my hair in a different way than usual to work, by virtue of the fact that I overslept in the morning, and woke to curly hair going in every direction. With some quick work, I twisted it and piled it on top of my head in a fashion that looked cute (to me, in my bleary eyed early morning state, staring blankly at the mirror!) and seemed to show off the various red and blond shades that I paid a great deal of money to have added to my natural colors over a three hour time slot last weekend.

Apparently, however, the new style paid off, and I received a number of compliments on the style, and on my choice of clothing (also quick and utilitarian - designed around the fact that I had known I would be spending a large chunk of yesterday afternoon re-potting the office plants, and mucking around in the dirt).

However, there was one coworker (whom I generally find rather difficult to respect) who may have been trying (on two different occasions) to pay a genuine compliment, but came off as basically telling me that I should dress and wear my hair in this manner more regularly, because this looked "pretty" and the other ways and clothes do not.

The whole situation reminded me of the need to frame words carefully - to pay attention to even things like the tone with which they are delivered. I'm not sure this coworker in any way intended to be rude and critical (though he does have a general tendency to be tempermental and concerned about everything but his own job), but he came off this way none-the-less.