I wrote this last night, during house church.
Luke 6:38 (NLT) - Give, and you will receive. Your gift will return to you in full - pressed down, shaken together to make room for more, running over, and pouring into your lap. The amount you give will determine the amount you get back.
There has been a shift in my life in the last month or so. Not necessarily a good shift. I have begun to resent God's call on my life to give - especially to such broken people. He has given me such a heart for the broken, but in the last while I have lost a bit of that. The heart is there, but I have begun to resent what it represents, what it calls me to. I have begun to ask God why I'm not receiving in return - when I will get my payback for what I have poured out, rather than simply being willing to obey and give. "Why aren't you seeing MY brokenness God? How come you're sending me to pour out my life for others and you're not sending someone to pour out their life for me?"
It's a very selfish sort of obedience. A grumpy following rather than a following with joy. A sense of "when am I going to get my just rewards?"
Father, I confess my selfish heart. I just want You. Soften my heart again. Restore within me Your heart. Let me see those to whom You ask me to give with Your eyes and not my own. Give me Your heart for the brokenness in their lives, Your desire for their healing. Forgive my selfish desires. Abba, I belong to You. I'm Yours. Wherever you want, wherever you say, that's where I want to be. I love You.
Wednesday, May 17, 2006
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1 comments:
This post is a PERFECT example of true Christianity versus the Christianity largely being preached in America today.
Christianity today (in America) mostly talks about attainment.
Jesus teaches divestment.
American churches talk a LOT about receiving God's blessing in and for our lives.
Jesus says if any one of us who wish to follow Him must deny our lives (ourself).
He says this straight up. No parable. Even saying "whoever puts his hand to the plow and looks back over his shoulder is not fit for service in the kingdom of God".
A lot of Christians give lip service to Phillipians 3:10-11 ("I want to know Jesus and the fellowship of His sufferings, and so becoming like Him, even in death".
This post is those verses come alive.
Your post here is living as Jesus teaches, which is vastly different from what most American churches say is the Way.
Selah
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