Daily 5 - Day 341

Today's Daily 5:

1. natural health treatment tonight
2. cooking dinner - a favorite recipe from when L and I lived together
3. laughing over another email from L.
4. a productive day, in spite of many threatening distractions
5. honest conversation on some hard topics with a dear friend.

Shake the Dust

I was watching and listening to this video again from Anis Mojgani.

Shake the Dust.

For me (yes, in spite of the rougher language at moments) this is a powerful image.

Shake the dust.

From life.

Brush off the cobwebs.

These last few weeks have been full of deep aches and brokenness.

In my own heart, and in those around me.

Carrying deep burdens of prayer.

Choosing to love when I'd really rather not.

They've been hard weeks, and I've been feeling down.

Some of that is just physical.  A change in medications that my body is having trouble adapting to.  The wear on one's body and mind from the kind of intense weeks I've been having.

Some is emotional and some spiritual.

I feel cobwebby.  Trapped in this crazy circle of feeling miserable and overwhelmed.

And I came across one of my own old posts, and was reminded that I've been here before.

Shake the dust.

Choose to celebrate hope.

Choose joy and life and peace.

Choose to be grateful for the healing that comes and is coming.

Choose to focus on all of those things instead of the brokenness.

And choose to trust Jesus with the brokenness.

In me, and in all whom I love.

Shake the Dust.

And really, really live.

Daily 5 - Day 340

Today's Daily 5:
(If you're new here, an introduction to the concept of the daily 5 can be found here.)

1. The midterm went well, I think.
2. Marking things off of a to-do list this evening
3. trading emails about the little (and big) stuff of life with a dear friend
4. getting an email from L.  who is currently in Rome.  the email made me laugh and her location made me jealous.
5. chatting with my brother T. while he ate his lunch today.
6. rewarding my study and midterm efforts of the day with an almond joy bar.
7. lighting candles all around my basement bedroom at Grandma's.  Partially because the room is cold, and I wanted the added warmth.  And partly because for me, candles are a way to pray, and bring Light.  And I needed that light tonight.
8. Sitting in the sunshine for a little while on mom and dad's patio, after my exam this morning, reading a novel and eating my breakfast.
9. wearing the necklace I wear every day, a white gold chain with a St. Clair of Assisi medal.  It's a medal with great personal meaning for me, and Claire is a favorite saint.  Some days I notice the medal more than others, the odd comfort in it's presence, the reminder of hope and healing that it holds for me.  Today was one of those days.
10. the sweet, fresh scents of the candles around the room.
11. watching an intense thunderstorm through the windows over supper with mom and dad
12. getting a ride home instead of having to take the bus, because of the storm
13. the smell of the air outside during the rain
14. curling up in my pjs and a favorite hoodie and working on my "to do" list from bed.
15. making lists - to do lists for other days this week, daily 5's, mental lists.  I like the sense of organization and they offer, while knowing that I'm also learning to be far more flexible in not only their construction, but their execution!

Passion Fatigue

I appreciated this brief article that Pete Greig wrote for the 24-7 Prayer website last week.

It's still challenging for me to read stuff from 24-7.  I have a very mixed history with them, from really meeting God deeply and discovering a heart for intercession in various prayer rooms, to some really rough experiences that took me to a place where it was well over a year before I was even able to venture into a prayer room again.  (And then, the first time I ventured back to one, I sat alone in the basement, quelling all the fears and memories and trying to really enter into worship in that space, and a fight quite literally broke out upstairs above me!)  That said, I am continually challenged by the lives and writing of some of those deeply involved in 24-7, and these days I work to be thankful for the good things that movement added to my faith, and not focus on the really painful memories.

I know the feelings that Pete is describing, though I think sometimes I get tired reading of all the reports of God's work and goodness simply because I'm not living in a place right now where I get to see much of that first hand.  After a while about reading about the things God is doing elsewhere, I get dissatisfied with the ways that I know he is working here.  I want "bigger and better."

And yet, I was struck by Pete's conclusion, as he spoke about the couple who simply wanted him to help them thank God.  Because that moment is one that is deeply moving, I think, and it reminds me to carry that contentment and thankfulness that I've been working to develop and carry with me.

Daily 5 - Day 339

Today's Daily 5:

1. Trading my hated Monday vaccuming chore for the chore of cooking supper.  I definitely got the way better end of that deal in my mind.
2. A tall mug of pomegranate green tea
3. taking a long hot bath and reading
4. watching the movie "Stranger than Fiction" with Mom and Dad tonight.  such great lines in that movie, and really, just one of the generally most creative and lovely movies on my list of favorites.
5. sleeping at mom and dad's tonight, because it's easier to get downtown for my 9 am midterm exam tomorrow morning from their house, than it is from Grandma's house.