A Tense Moment

My brother Tim and I had a few tense moments this morning. You see, we were quite desperate to get tickets to an upcoming concert in town, and tried to get them in the pre-buy yesterday. The prebuy sold out in three minutes.

So, we were both ready on ticketmaster's website this morning. Him at work, and me at home, on our cell phones (we didn't want to end up with four tickets at 90 bucks a pop).

We thought we had them, we hung up. He was going to pay. He called right back. A problem with his ticketmaster account. He had a line on another pair, but it wouldn't let him buy them. So I managed to get some, and the last pair we had are probably the best pair. The seats are decent, far enough up the bowl that we'll be able to see the stage. But we had ten tense minutes wondering if our dreams would be dashed!

And the concert that we hung our hopes on? Rascal Flats. I know that some of you will consider it my one failing that I love country music, but I can't help it. I just do, and Rascal Flats is some of the best country music around. Plus, my brother loves them (if not necessarily country) even more than I do. So, my youngest brother and I are headed to a concert on February 22nd!

Unrestfully at Rest

I am in a bit of a strange place this morning. The best way I can describe it is the title I used for this post - unrestfully at rest.

There is a quietness in my soul today, that has been lacking the last several weeks. And yet, circumstances would seem to dictate that it should not exist. I received some painful news yesterday afternoon. I am soul weary, but at peace - a peace that I described in my journal this morning as all encompassing and yet strangely empty.

There is a lyric from a Chris Tomlin song that has been floating around my head since yesterday morning, and is resonating in deep places today. "I am loved by the King, and it makes my heart want to sing."

Abba, I belong to you. Show me where you're working today and how I can join you.

Wisdom from Henri

Came across this quote this morning, and could relate!

“I often wonder if my knowledge about God has not become my greatest stumbling block to my knowledge of God.”
— Henri Nouwen

Dream Issues

I’m having dream issues again. Not the “dreams about the future” type issues, but the “while you’re asleep at night” type dream issues. Specifically, I’m still wondering which dreams I need to pay attention to, and which ones are the result of bad pizza. And, in terms of the ones I need to pay attention to, how do I distinguish which ones are from God versus which ones are a form of spiritual attack?

Because I had a dream last night, and it could go either way. What makes it more confusing is, as I was praying before I went to sleep last night, I asked God a very specific question, and the dream could very easily answer that question. However, the dream was rather nightmarish, so it could also be an attack in an area of great vulnerability. Have I confused you all? I don’t really want to get into details on the blog. If you’re good at dreams, pop me an email and I’ll probably give you details.

Uggh. Have I mentioned how much I’m NOT into the whole dream thing most days?

A Mild Anti-depressant

I was listening to a speech on my ipod on my way to work yesterday, and the speaker was talking about a friend of his who is a trauma counseller. When this friend was training, she was told that one of the best things they could do for trauma victims was to have them make a list each day of the things they are grateful for. Apparently, they've done studies, and making a list of the things you're thankful for each day does the same thing physiologically as a mild dose of anti-depressant. Very cool.

Anyway, here's some of things that are making me smile today...

• purple and white argyle socks
• mellow music to accompany a snowy day spent doing domestic sorts of things
• the sense of accomplishment that comes from ticking things off my list of things to do
• a chance to go out and do errands. Have I mentioned that I love doing errands?
• a chance to sleep in, and then, after a quick trip to the bathroom, crawl right back into be and curl up with a good book for an hour and a bit.
• a comfy favorite hoody and jeans to wear (I do love casual clothes after dressing nicely for work all week)
• a general sense of tidiness and comfort in my bedroom.
• hot pink crocs - still making me happy every time I put them on.
• a fresh perspective brought on by a good night's sleep after a rather difficult day yesterday
• plans to do at least one creative thing today

It occurs to me that I am rather easy to please... why does it seem so difficult some days to be happy, when something so small as a trip to the post office, and argyle socks can make me smile? I need to work on being more regularly aware of things that I'm enjoying, instead of locking in on the things that are weighing heavily on my heart and mind.

Jesus, you make me smile. I'm grateful for the reminder to be grateful. Thanks for all the little things in my life.