I didn't actually do many of the Christmas related things on my list today, though I did get a few little gifts bought (as well as a little gift for myself!) I may still put up the tree, but I'm not feeling highly motivated to get to that. It needs to get done this weekend, but again, I'm more of an advent sort of girl than a Christmas Spirit sort of girl, and well, I guess I'm saying it's hard to motivate myself to do it.
I did however, clean my house quite thoroughly. Our kitchen and bathroom have been scrubbed from top to bottom. And I did a load of laundry as well.
And just as another tangent, is there anything quite as nice as taking that first shower in a freshly scrubbed bathroom, and then toweling off with a towel freshly fluffed from the dryer, and smelling sweetly of whatever your preferred fabric softener is?
I'm headed for my bedroom shortly. I need to clean it as well. To make my space tidy again, and a space conducive to sitting for reading, prayer, and just general resting or thinking.
And then, once it's clean, I'm going to sit for a while and read and pray, or just generally rest and think.
I'll probably go to church later. And maybe I'll do the recycling. And the Christmas tree. That will happen this weekend. There's groceries to be bought (though I think that can wait for tomorrow), and I need to get gas for George as well.
Saturday, December 06, 2008
Saturday Morning Thoughts (With an Advent Tangent)
It's Saturday morning again. I seem to write these posts on a regular basis.
I'm in the midst of a couple of days of fairly intentional quiet and prayer.
Still in a season of fasting and waiting and praying.
But today, though I'm moving a bit slowly, conscious of my energy and the demands of what I do on my body, I'm going to find things that are joyful.
I'm going to start my Christmas shopping, and go with my roommate to do some of her Christmas shopping. I need to find birthday gifts for three separate people who all have birthday's before Christmas. I may even put up my Christmas tree.
That seems like a lot of Christmas for one day.
I'm sort of one of these people who really likes Advent. I don't tend to get into the "Christmas Spirit" until Christmas Eve. There's something for me in the darkness of Advent, the waiting and longing for light to enter the world, for the birth of the savior.
So, I do all the Christmasy things that are necessary before Christmas eve, but I'm not really feeling it until then. Until it's the moment of arrival. The birth of the child.
I used to feel bad about that. Like I was some sort of Christmas spoil-sport. But this year, in the midst of the season of life I've found myself in, I've told myself that it's okay to simply embrace this. To wait and long for the birth of a savior, for the arrival of light in the world. To move slowly and quietly through the darkness, preparing (buying gifts, decorating, etc.) for the coming of Christmas, but not hurrying the process, or feeling bad for not yet being ready to celebrate. Anticipation and longing, I've decided, are not unhealthy things.
And, with that unexpected Advent tangent, I'm off to do laundry, and head out to do things that prepare for the coming celebration of light and birth.
I'm in the midst of a couple of days of fairly intentional quiet and prayer.
Still in a season of fasting and waiting and praying.
But today, though I'm moving a bit slowly, conscious of my energy and the demands of what I do on my body, I'm going to find things that are joyful.
I'm going to start my Christmas shopping, and go with my roommate to do some of her Christmas shopping. I need to find birthday gifts for three separate people who all have birthday's before Christmas. I may even put up my Christmas tree.
That seems like a lot of Christmas for one day.
I'm sort of one of these people who really likes Advent. I don't tend to get into the "Christmas Spirit" until Christmas Eve. There's something for me in the darkness of Advent, the waiting and longing for light to enter the world, for the birth of the savior.
So, I do all the Christmasy things that are necessary before Christmas eve, but I'm not really feeling it until then. Until it's the moment of arrival. The birth of the child.
I used to feel bad about that. Like I was some sort of Christmas spoil-sport. But this year, in the midst of the season of life I've found myself in, I've told myself that it's okay to simply embrace this. To wait and long for the birth of a savior, for the arrival of light in the world. To move slowly and quietly through the darkness, preparing (buying gifts, decorating, etc.) for the coming of Christmas, but not hurrying the process, or feeling bad for not yet being ready to celebrate. Anticipation and longing, I've decided, are not unhealthy things.
And, with that unexpected Advent tangent, I'm off to do laundry, and head out to do things that prepare for the coming celebration of light and birth.
Friday, December 05, 2008
Friday Night Bullet Points
Random Friday Night Musings:
- I'm wearing a favorite pair of navy blue sweats. They are a hand-me-down from my best friend, during one of her recent moves, and I've worn them around the house, and occasionally as pajamas ever since. I've been missing her a lot lately (what with her being on the other side of the world in an unstable country and all) and it brings a smile to my face to curl up for a quiet Friday evening in her sweat pants.
- Last night I got a couple of hugs from a very dear friend. I'd been looking forward to them for a few weeks, and it was so nice to get them. Even though our time together was short, I was so glad we got even the few minutes we had.
- I bought myself a single red rose today. It's sitting in a bud vase on my dressing table, reminding me of many special moments from this year.
- I read a passage in a book tonight that made me laugh. Mostly because the author made a point that a friend of mine has been trying to make to me for at least a couple of months.
- I think I'll start my Christmas shopping tomorrow.
- And put up the Christmas tree.
- I think I'll write a blog post in the next few days with the title "Why I Watch Grey's Anatomy"
- I'm curled up on my couch, enjoying a quiet Friday evening at home. This is definitely my favorite way to spend a Friday evening.
- I'm still loving the scents of Frankincense and Myrrh. Oddly seasonal, and yet just odd. Burial spices.
- I'm still reading Jeremiah. Stuck in chapter 31 at the moment, reading it over and over.
- I'm thinking about a Lauren Winner quote in regards to fasting. "Fasting reminds us that our truest hunger is for God."
"I Was Made for War" (a prayer for her)
I don’t think I’ll ever forget her voice as she described the strength and energy the lyrics brought her in the midst of her deep brokenness. The words she used that night, sitting in my car in the dark, have long ago escaped from my memory, but her tone of voice, the strength, the hope, the joy that it carried remain.
I’m thinking about her again today, and praying for her. I’ve been listening today to the CD that we were talking about those few years back. It’s become one I’ve listened to a lot again lately, giving words to the prayers of my heart for some others that I dearly love.
She quoted a line from one of the songs, “I was made for war. I was made for battle, Lord,” and her voice carried such strength. Such hope. She was in the midst of an intense battleground, and I think she felt as if it was a losing thing most of the time. She was strong and independent – street smart – and having trouble assimilating that part of herself with her newly discovered faith in Jesus. I think she felt that as a young woman she was supposed to be compliant, pious, and quiet.
But she was engaged in a battle for her life. A battle with addiction. A battle for mental health. A battle for survival, and compliant, pious, and quiet just weren’t cutting it. Then, a mutual friend of ours (the one who also introduced me to this particular CD and artist) gave her a copy of Rita Springer’s “Effortless” album, and suggested that she would perhaps enjoy the song “Holy Visitation” where Springer cries out for the presence of God, and declares boldly that she is ready and able to stand up and fight. And my friend found such encouragement in that. Such strength and hope in the midst of the darkest hours of the night.
There are so many songs on that album that have stories like this one for me. Songs that God has used over and over to call me to intercede. To encourage friends of mine. To simply worship Him. Some of the songs have more than one story to go with them.
And so, as this album has surfaced in my collection again lately, and I’ve been listening to it on repeat all day as I sit at work, sticking labels on envelopes, my heart is again being called to pray. To pray for many friends. To pray for those I love dearly. And to simply worship. And in the midst of that, today, my heart remembers her. I’ve lost track of her now, though I’m fairly certain she’s made a new life in a different province. But every so often she comes to mind, in moments like today, and my heart still whispers a prayer for her.
I’m thinking about her again today, and praying for her. I’ve been listening today to the CD that we were talking about those few years back. It’s become one I’ve listened to a lot again lately, giving words to the prayers of my heart for some others that I dearly love.
She quoted a line from one of the songs, “I was made for war. I was made for battle, Lord,” and her voice carried such strength. Such hope. She was in the midst of an intense battleground, and I think she felt as if it was a losing thing most of the time. She was strong and independent – street smart – and having trouble assimilating that part of herself with her newly discovered faith in Jesus. I think she felt that as a young woman she was supposed to be compliant, pious, and quiet.
But she was engaged in a battle for her life. A battle with addiction. A battle for mental health. A battle for survival, and compliant, pious, and quiet just weren’t cutting it. Then, a mutual friend of ours (the one who also introduced me to this particular CD and artist) gave her a copy of Rita Springer’s “Effortless” album, and suggested that she would perhaps enjoy the song “Holy Visitation” where Springer cries out for the presence of God, and declares boldly that she is ready and able to stand up and fight. And my friend found such encouragement in that. Such strength and hope in the midst of the darkest hours of the night.
There are so many songs on that album that have stories like this one for me. Songs that God has used over and over to call me to intercede. To encourage friends of mine. To simply worship Him. Some of the songs have more than one story to go with them.
And so, as this album has surfaced in my collection again lately, and I’ve been listening to it on repeat all day as I sit at work, sticking labels on envelopes, my heart is again being called to pray. To pray for many friends. To pray for those I love dearly. And to simply worship. And in the midst of that, today, my heart remembers her. I’ve lost track of her now, though I’m fairly certain she’s made a new life in a different province. But every so often she comes to mind, in moments like today, and my heart still whispers a prayer for her.
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