Monday, August 25, 2008

Hold me near..

My friend Karla Adolphe penned these lyrics to a song simply titled "Hold Me Near" which appears on the album I mentioned earlier today "Enter the Worship Circle: Chair and Microphone Volume 3". Tonight, though, as I sit in my bedroom, curled up, exhausted, and crying, with Karla's voice singing over my stereo, they are something more. They are the prayer and cry of my heart.

Hold me near
when I am restless
Hold me near
when I am bitter
Hold me near
when I'm rebellious
Hold me near
until the end

Hold me near
when my heart is broken
Hold me near
when I'm ignorant
Hold me near
when I am jealous
Hold me near
until the end

But as for me
my feet almost gave out
I nearly sold my heart
It's good to be
held by my father
It's good to be
where you are

Papua

Last week I had the privilege of listening to a young woman speak about the three and a half years she spent teaching and working in a small seminary in Papua New Guinea - the part that is actually considered part of Indonesia.

Her words were powerful, and sparked some rather surprising decisions in me. (No, I'm not heading for Papua any time soon!) But they did challenge me greatly.

Today, I received the following urgent email from a missionary that the church I grew up in has long provided prayer support to. After years as a missionary in the field in Indonesia, he and his wife now serve as a sort of traveling pastor/counsellor couple to other missionaries with their organization all over South East Asia. Because of my experience last week, I am praying specifically for them today.

URGENT: I am extending my time in Papua, Indonesia for two more days (until the 28th). There are various crisis at the present moment, and it feels like this field is under attack. Please pray that Satan’s designs would be thwarted and that God’s Spirit would move powerfully among us, convicting, encouraging, and strengthening all that are in great need at this time. “Father, you tell us to take the full armor of God and to trust in the Lord with all our hearts, not depending on our own understanding. We ask you now to protect your Church from the evil one, and break through the bonds that bind us and hinder unity. We want to see your Name lifted up and your people filled by and walking in your Spirit”

Monday Morning Thoughts

It's Monday morning again.

I nearly stayed home ill today. Not that I'm so much sick, as simply exhausted.

It's now been a week of waking at 3 am every morning. I sleep a bit after that, but never deep or restful sleep.

I'm struggling with being very sensitive to certain things again. It's playing out in some health matters, but also, I think in my sleep. I've had some rather terrifying dreams again lately - which, in combination with the minimal amount of sleep that I get, is a problem.

I'm fairly certain that sometime in the next month I will become a car owner. That will, at least, allow me to mostly eliminate the many "adventures" I have on the bus and train each week from my days.

I'm listening to Enter the Worship Circle Chair and Microphone Volume 3 this morning, which features my friend Karla Adolphe (of Jacob and Lily fame!). I'm needing to hear her words and prayers right now. I played this disc all day yesterday, and suspect I'll do the same today. Reminders of the nearness of Jesus even in the midst of the darker spaces.

Drew wrote a post about healing that I really liked. You can find it here.

And Claudia Mair Burney wrote a post that included a beautiful Ignatian prayer -the words of God to us. You can find that here.

I'm sipping tea. Fighting a headache. Working to make it through another day.

It's only Monday and I'm already anxious for the arrival of the weekend.

Ah well.

Here we go again!