Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Tuesday - Little Things

It's the little things, you know?

The little things that I'm thinking about tonight.

About how, a few weeks ago, I heard Jesus speak love to me through the voice of my dad. I was showing my parents a lovely new coat I'd purchased, that I was very excited about. I'd bought it because, when I looked at it in the mirror, I felt elegant. A particular word and description were stored in my mind, a secret feeling of beauty. No one could have known that word. I hadn't told anyone. And yet, as my dad complimented the coat, he used that word to describe it. And I heard in his voice, the whisper of Jesus saying "you really are beautiful."

About a moment last night, when the voice of another friend confirmed something I thought I'd heard Jesus say. I was purchasing a gift for a friend, wondering if she'd like it, but a particular word was associated with it immediately when I saw the item in the store, and that word meant something, so I went ahead and purchased the item. Later in the evening, I was showing my roommate and her fiancee the item. Her fiancee immediately used the word I'd "heard" when I'd first seen the item to describe it. It made me smile to hear God's whisper to me, his encouragement to pray, in the words of another.

I'm thinking about less serious little things too.

About taking control, and being proactive in the attempt to see some changes in my life.

About eating peanut M & M's. I feel that they must be eaten in a specific color order, though this order varies based on my mood. You always eat the ugliest or most boring color first, and the prettiest color last. Blue is always the prettiest color, with red the second prettiest. The order varies from there depending on my mood.

I haven't watched the innauguration address yet - I guess that's more of a big thing. But I'm planning to do that shortly here.

I have, however, in the last few days, enjoyed two older movies that always make me smile. The American President, and Sabrina (the version with Harrison Ford.)

It was nice to eat a properly home-cooked meal tonight. I made baked chicken breasts, and roasted baby potatoes, and peas.

Little things like sales on items that are a bit of a luxury, but are justifiable on sale.

Little things like three pure white candles, that smell like spring, lit most evenings on my dresser, near where I sit to read and write and think and rest and pray.

And little things like Anne Lamott's "bird by bird" story. I'm reading her book of that title right now, and I love the story that gives it the title - you should pick the book up and read it.

I told a friend the other night that that's my current motto. That for a while, I'm just going to take life "bird by bird".

Tonight I'm glad for the little things.

Martyrs?

This was an interesting read...

20 Missionaries Killed in 2008

Fire Again...

This article caught my attention today. I vaguely remember driving past this beautiful old building on the many times I've been in Waterton.

Waterton Lakes' Kilmorey Lodge Destroyed by Fire

More Thought Nuggets from Henri

A few more thoughts from Henri Nouwen that have arrived in my inbox recently...

Be Yourself

Often we want to be somewhere other than where we are, or even to be someone other than who we are. We tend to compare ourselves constantly with others and wonder why we are not as rich, as intelligent, as simple, as generous, or as saintly as they are. Such comparisons make us feel guilty, ashamed, or jealous. It is very important to realize that our vocation is hidden in where we are and who we are. We are unique human beings, each with a call to realize in life what nobody else can, and to realize it in the concrete context of the here and now.

We will never find our vocations by trying to figure out whether we are better or worse than others. We are good enough to do what we are called to do. Be yourself!

Finding Solitude

All human beings are alone. No other person will completely feel like we do, think like we do, act like we do. Each of us is unique, and our aloneness is the other side of our uniqueness. The question is whether we let our aloneness become loneliness or whether we allow it to lead us into solitude. Loneliness is painful; solitude is peaceful. Loneliness makes us cling to others in desperation; solitude allows us to respect others in their uniqueness and create community.

Letting our aloneness grow into solitude and not into loneliness is a lifelong struggle. It requires conscious choices about whom to be with, what to study, how to pray, and when to ask for counsel. But wise choices will help us to find the solitude where our hearts can grow in love.

Creating Space to Dance Together

When we feel lonely we keep looking for a person or persons who can take our loneliness away. Our lonely hearts cry out, "Please hold me, touch me, speak to me, pay attention to me." But soon we discover that the person we expect to take our loneliness away cannot give us what we ask for. Often that person feels oppressed by our demands and runs away, leaving us in despair. As long as we approach another person from our loneliness, no mature human relationship can develop. Clinging to one another in loneliness is suffocating and eventually becomes destructive. For love to be possible we need the courage to create space between us and to trust that this space allows us to dance together.