- peanut butter toast
- pomegranate green tea
- being there in a moment when it was needed to pray for someone I love
- unexpectedly getting an errand done
- a restful afternoon
- a family gathering that mostly included laughter
- angry birds (yep, finally downloaded it, and now slightly addicted. may have also managed to addict my sister in law and baby brother)
- still loving the reverb 10 prompts
- really enjoying the latest book I'm reading for booksneeze
- chinese food for supper
- a long conversation at dad's church this morning with someone who has been a friend/mentor for years
- getting a christmas card/picture from a favorite family at dad's church to add to my wall of happiness when I get back to my place tomorrow night.
Sunday, December 19, 2010
Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 126
Today's Daily 5:
Reverb 10: Day 19 - Healing
Today's Reverb 10 prompt:
December 19 – Healing.
What healed you this year? Was it sudden, or a drip-by-drip evolution? How would you like to be healed in 2011?
(Author: Leonie Allan)
I feel like of all the prompts so far, this one should really be the easiest one for me to form an answer to. I mean, I talk about healing, and my own journey of healing in this space on at least a weekly, if not a daily basis. Healing in general, in all its forms, is one of my favorite topics of discussion, writing, and conversation. And yet, I spent a good chunk of time today wondering how I was going to answer this because so much of the answer is still too deeply personal and internal to share in this public place where people I know, and people I don't show up and read each day.
Here's what I can say - healing came in unexpected forms and places this year. It came in conscious choices. It came mostly in the latter part of the year.
I have particularly found healing in some decisions I made after escaping to California in September. The complete change of scenery gave me the mental, emotional and spiritual space to re-evaluate many things and make decisions about moving forward. I made conscious choices to involve some others in my journey of healing. To seek help where I needed it, and to draw a very unexpected group of people around me to pray and love and support me as I sought to heal. I found incredible healing in discovering that the messyness of life was known by these people, and that I was deeply loved for who I am, and not for what I contribute. I found healing in conversations and prayer, and a continual commitment to seek it out.
I have found healing in the job I'm working at right now. It was another unexpected God thing - He knew before I did that I really needed to be employed for these six weeks, and not trying to fill time at home. I think He knew, too, long before I discovered it, that I needed to be working for a Christian organization that really does put God at the center of what they're doing. An organization that seeks to live out the scriptures that talk about feeding and clothing, and about doing justice and loving mercy and walking humbly with God. After so many years in the position I lost, in a place where in some ways the faith label was just there to garner business, and a lifetime as a pastor's kid, I have found it healing to live in a place where a love for God really is something that is lived out and plays out all around me each and every day.
Honestly, as 2011 comes, I pray that the healing that has begun in 2010 continues. That it comes in ways that surprise me, like this job, and that it comes in those same relationships and choices that have also blessed me.
December 19 – Healing.
What healed you this year? Was it sudden, or a drip-by-drip evolution? How would you like to be healed in 2011?
(Author: Leonie Allan)
I feel like of all the prompts so far, this one should really be the easiest one for me to form an answer to. I mean, I talk about healing, and my own journey of healing in this space on at least a weekly, if not a daily basis. Healing in general, in all its forms, is one of my favorite topics of discussion, writing, and conversation. And yet, I spent a good chunk of time today wondering how I was going to answer this because so much of the answer is still too deeply personal and internal to share in this public place where people I know, and people I don't show up and read each day.
Here's what I can say - healing came in unexpected forms and places this year. It came in conscious choices. It came mostly in the latter part of the year.
I have particularly found healing in some decisions I made after escaping to California in September. The complete change of scenery gave me the mental, emotional and spiritual space to re-evaluate many things and make decisions about moving forward. I made conscious choices to involve some others in my journey of healing. To seek help where I needed it, and to draw a very unexpected group of people around me to pray and love and support me as I sought to heal. I found incredible healing in discovering that the messyness of life was known by these people, and that I was deeply loved for who I am, and not for what I contribute. I found healing in conversations and prayer, and a continual commitment to seek it out.
I have found healing in the job I'm working at right now. It was another unexpected God thing - He knew before I did that I really needed to be employed for these six weeks, and not trying to fill time at home. I think He knew, too, long before I discovered it, that I needed to be working for a Christian organization that really does put God at the center of what they're doing. An organization that seeks to live out the scriptures that talk about feeding and clothing, and about doing justice and loving mercy and walking humbly with God. After so many years in the position I lost, in a place where in some ways the faith label was just there to garner business, and a lifetime as a pastor's kid, I have found it healing to live in a place where a love for God really is something that is lived out and plays out all around me each and every day.
Honestly, as 2011 comes, I pray that the healing that has begun in 2010 continues. That it comes in ways that surprise me, like this job, and that it comes in those same relationships and choices that have also blessed me.
I Did It Again
Some time ago now I wrote about a classic foot in mouth moment in my life. It was one of the more ridiculously humorous moments I've had.
I did it again this morning at the same church, with the same person. Perhaps not quite as badly, but it was definitely a case of "same story, second verse."
Sigh.
My internal voice started warning me the second I walked in the door. She was standing right there, waiting. The long time nemesis to my ability to be gracious. The one who has the unique ability to bring forth in me a raging case of foot in mouth disease.
And so my internal voice was talking. "Be careful. Smile. Be polite. Minimal words. Filter."
It didn't work.
I seem to possess the unique ability to shock this woman, even when the things I say aren't all that shocking.
"Are you ready for Christmas," she asked.
I laughed, cheerfully, and answered lightly, honestly, "Nope!"
So far so good.
"Well you know it's going to come anyway, whether you're ready or not!"
(In retrospect, who says something like that?)
Even as I responded again, my internal voice was screaming those same warnings it had been sounding since I entered the building, "Lisa Christine, be polite! Smile! Filter!"
And then the train derailed, though I didn't know it yet.
My mouth opened, ignore the warnings still sounding within me, and I spoke, still with a cheerful tone, "That's okay, I'm not its biggest fan. It can come and go and it will be fine."
Honesty is not the best policy. Sharing a bit of ambivalence over someone's pointed cheer is bad news.
And the shock registered on her face.
I wasn't even going for shock. I've been guilty of shooting for that in the past, but today I was going for the opposite. In this case, I was simply expressing the thought that crossed my mind - that though Christmas is special, I'm just a bit ambivalent about it. Glad for it, but not all that worried about it's coming and going. It really didn't occur to me that this would be a piece of news that would be shocking, or offensive.
But it was.
Sigh. Sometimes I just can't win.
At least this one won't require a report to mom and dad to allay the tattling concern of a well meaning busy body. That, in nearly three decades of navigating this stony pastor's kid journey is a blessing all its own!
I did it again this morning at the same church, with the same person. Perhaps not quite as badly, but it was definitely a case of "same story, second verse."
Sigh.
My internal voice started warning me the second I walked in the door. She was standing right there, waiting. The long time nemesis to my ability to be gracious. The one who has the unique ability to bring forth in me a raging case of foot in mouth disease.
And so my internal voice was talking. "Be careful. Smile. Be polite. Minimal words. Filter."
It didn't work.
I seem to possess the unique ability to shock this woman, even when the things I say aren't all that shocking.
"Are you ready for Christmas," she asked.
I laughed, cheerfully, and answered lightly, honestly, "Nope!"
So far so good.
"Well you know it's going to come anyway, whether you're ready or not!"
(In retrospect, who says something like that?)
Even as I responded again, my internal voice was screaming those same warnings it had been sounding since I entered the building, "Lisa Christine, be polite! Smile! Filter!"
And then the train derailed, though I didn't know it yet.
My mouth opened, ignore the warnings still sounding within me, and I spoke, still with a cheerful tone, "That's okay, I'm not its biggest fan. It can come and go and it will be fine."
Honesty is not the best policy. Sharing a bit of ambivalence over someone's pointed cheer is bad news.
And the shock registered on her face.
I wasn't even going for shock. I've been guilty of shooting for that in the past, but today I was going for the opposite. In this case, I was simply expressing the thought that crossed my mind - that though Christmas is special, I'm just a bit ambivalent about it. Glad for it, but not all that worried about it's coming and going. It really didn't occur to me that this would be a piece of news that would be shocking, or offensive.
But it was.
Sigh. Sometimes I just can't win.
At least this one won't require a report to mom and dad to allay the tattling concern of a well meaning busy body. That, in nearly three decades of navigating this stony pastor's kid journey is a blessing all its own!
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