Thursday, March 26, 2009

Abba.

For much of the afternoon, and on into the evening, my heart was deeply unsettled.

I tried to pray. But words just wouldn't (and aren't) forming.

I've been praying a rosary book - a book of prayers and scriptures designed for the Anglican rosary - nightly since the new year began. Each and every night, just before sleep, the scriptures and prayers, and the prayer Jesus taught us to pray.

Our Father. Sometimes I can barely make it past that line. My lips move and repeat the rest of the prayer. But my heart is stuck there. In that space. Calling out for a Father.

And all afternoon, as I tried to find words, my heart simply cried out, over and over, "Abba." "Abba".

I need a God who is Abba - Daddy - right now. A God who draws near. A God who waits with me. A God who holds me, and wipes my many tears.

And so, as my heart remains unsettled, the only words that will form on my lips are "Abba."

And sometimes, "Abba, help."

Wow.

I linked last night to a Lenten post on Ragamuffin Diva.

And then I went back this morning and read her next two posts.

And oh boy have I had similar conversations with Jesus at times. (Even really rather recently.)

I love Claudia Mair Burney's novel's, and I'm loving the way she's chosen to share her Lenten journey this year. Because I've been there, and am there, and find walking the way of Lent both incredibly painful, and (hopefully) deeply moving and healing.

you can find the posts here:

On the Rock

Wilderness Training

The Healing Touch

This thought from Henri Nouwen struck me yesterday.

These days, almost all of the people who offer this sort of healing touch live far away. But in the moments when we get to be together, I soak it in.

I used to be one of those people who hated hugs or touch. Somewhere along the way, I realized that a hug is one of the most healing and encouraging things in my world, and that, when I haven't had one for a long time, I am the worse for it.

I'm grateful to have people in my life who offer very healing hugs and touch, even when I can't collect on them very often.

The Healing Touch

Touch, yes, touch, speaks the wordless words of love. We receive so much touch when we are babies and so little when we are adults. Still, in friendship touch often gives more life than words. A friend's hand stroking our back, a friend's arms resting on our shoulder, a friend's fingers wiping our tears away, a friend's lips kissing our forehead --- these are true consolation. These moments of touch are truly sacred. They restore, they reconcile, they reassure, they forgive, they heal.

Everyone who touched Jesus and everyone whom Jesus touched were healed. God's love and power went out from him (see Luke 6:19). When a friend touches us with free, nonpossessive love, it is God's incarnate love that touches us and God's power that heals us.