Friday, March 06, 2009

Being Heard

I was reminded again this morning of the importance of being heard.

Work yesterday was enough to put me in a murderous raging kind of mood.

The first thing I did upon getting home (other than get dinner into the oven and started cooking) was to take a shower. I just felt slimy from the day I'd had and wanted nothing so much as to clean up and feel refreshed.

I think my roommates ask each night how my day has gone just because they know that there will always be a story that makes them laugh, and almost always a story that makes them grateful for their much "saner" jobs and coworkers.

After I commented on a particularly trying coworkers constant, just loud enough for me to have to hear, "ouches" and "ows" that have been filling my days this week, my roommate made a suggestion that made me laugh long and hard. She suggested that I start up a conversation at my desk with another coworker who is a good friend about how I've been reading in scripture lately about how I've been reading the book of Job recently, and I've been quite impressed with the way he suffered in silence! Or that we talk about how Jesus also suffered in silence! The memory of that comment has been buoying me and adding secret laughter all day.

Anyway, I arrived at the office this morning to discover that things had gotten worse, rather than better overnight.

Instant bad mood ensued, coming on the heels of a night where I'd slept even less than usual, and had dealt with several restless, emotional, and frightening dreams.

It's worse this week because I've been praying and trying harder than usual to be patient with this particular person and situation, but the last two days I hit my breaking point. My facebook status last night briefly read "Lisa mostly has the patience to deal with it, but sometimes contemplates justifiable homicide."

And then I was reminded of how nice it was to be heard. One long and very necessary conversation with my boss later, and I'm feeling better about the situation. Not entirely optimistic, because I've been down this road at least once a month for the last year, but encouraged that my boss at least is aware of what has been going on, and is nearly as frustrated with the lack of movement in the situation as I am.

So, here's hoping for better things in the coming weeks.

As for me, I'm celebrating that it's Friday and that means I'm wearing jeans at the office, and, that because of my quick overnight trip to Montana, I'm leaving the office an hour earlier than usual today (time I made up by coming in early two mornings this week, but still a fantastic thought after a trying week.) It's the weekend, and that's almost always worth smiling about!

Henri on Hospitality

I was quite struck by this thought from Henri Nouwen today.

True Hospitality

Every good relationship between two or more people, whether it is friendship, marriage, or community, creates space where strangers can enter and become friends. Good relationships are hospitable. When we enter into a home and feel warmly welcomed, we will soon realise that the love among those who live in that home is what makes that welcome possible.

When there is conflict in the home, the guest is soon forced to choose sides. "Are you for him or for her?" "Do you agree with them or with us?" "Do you like him more than you do me?" These questions prevent true hospitality - that is, an opportunity for the stranger to feel safe and discover his or her own gifts. Hospitality is more than an expression of love for the guest. It is also and foremost an expression of love between the hosts.