Friday Reflections, August 10, 2012

Another challenging reflection from Henri Nouwen today:


A Window on Our Spiritual Lives

Even though our emotional and spiritual lives are distinct, they do influence one another profoundly.  Our feelings often give us a window on our spiritual journeys.  When we cannot let go of jealousy, we may wonder if we are in touch with the Spirit in us that cries out "Abba."  When we feel very peaceful and "centered," we may come to realise that this is a sign of our deep awareness of our belovedness.

Likewise our prayer lives, lived as faithful response to the presence of the Spirit within us, may open a window on our emotions, feelings, and passions and give us some indication of how to put them into the service of our long journey into the heart of God.

Friday Reflections, August 3, 2012

Today's reflection is once again from Henri Nouwen...


Bridging the Gap Between People

To become neighbours is to bridge the gap between people.  As long as there is distance between us and we cannot look in each other's eyes, all sorts of false ideas and images arise.  We give them names, make jokes about them, cover them with our prejudices, and avoid direct contact.  We think of them as enemies.  We forget that they love as we love, care for their children as we care for ours, become sick and die as we do.  We forget that they are our brothers and sisters and treat them as objects that can be destroyed at will.

Only when we have the courage to cross the street and look in one another's eyes can we see there that we are children of the same God and members of the same human family.

Friday Reflections, July 27, 2012

Today's reflection spoke to my tired and drained heart.  It's once again written by Henri Nouwen.


What We Feel Is Not Who We Are


Our emotional lives move up and down constantly.  Sometimes we experience great mood swings: from excitement to depression, from joy to sorrow, from inner harmony to inner chaos.  A little event, a word from someone, a disappointment in work, many things can trigger such mood swings.  Mostly we have little control over these changes.  It seems that they happen to us rather than being created by us.

Thus it is important to know that our emotional life is not the same as our spiritual life.  Our spiritual life is the life of the Spirit of God within us.  As we feel our emotions shift we must connect our spirits with the Spirit of God and remind ourselves that what we feel is not who we are.  We are and remain, whatever our moods, God's beloved children.

Friday Reflections, July 20, 2012

This week's reflection is once again from Henri Nouwen, and greatly moved me, speaking of experiences that I've had over the past several months and years.


Words That Create Community

The word is always a word for others.  Words need to be heard.  When we give words to what we are living, these words need to be received and responded to.  A speaker needs a listener.  A writer needs a reader.

When the flesh - the lived human experience - becomes word, community can develop.  When we say,  "Let me tell you what we saw.  Come and listen to what we did.  Sit down and let me explain to you what happened to us.  Wait until you hear whom we met,"  we call people together and make our lives into lives for others.   The word brings us together and calls us into community.  When the flesh becomes word, our bodies become part of a body of people. 

Friday Reflections, July 13, 2012

This week's Friday reflection is from Henri Nouwen:


Spiritual Courage

Courage is connected with taking risks.  Jumping the Grand Canyon on a motorbike, coming over Niagara Falls in a barrel, or crossing the ocean in a rowboat are called courageous acts because people risk their lives by doing these things.  But none of these daredevil acts comes from the centre of our being.  They all come from the desire to test our physical limits and to become famous and popular.  

Spiritual courage is something completely different.  It is following the deepest desires of our hearts at the risk of losing fame and popularity.  It asks of us the willingness to lose our temporal lives in order to gain eternal life.

Friday Reflections, May 25, 2012

Today's Friday Reflection is again from Henri Nouwen, and builds nicely on the thoughts that I shared yesterday about feeling creatively and personally dry and stuck.  I'm hoping to carve out time in Scripture and other spiritual books this weekend that will let the Incarnation birth in a fresh way in me again.


To Let the Word Become Flesh 


Spiritual reading is food for our souls.  As we slowly let the words of the Bible or any spiritual book enter into our minds and descend into our hearts, we become different people.  The Word gradually becomes flesh in us and thus transforms our whole beings.  Thus spiritual reading is a continuing incarnation of the divine Word within us.  In and through Jesus, the Christ, God became flesh long ago.  In and through our reading of God's Word and our reflection on it, God becomes flesh in us now and thus makes us into living Christs for today.


Let's keep reading God's Word with love and great reverence.

Friday Reflections, May 18, 2012

I'm back to Henri Nouwen again this week, talking about our tendency to live with a scarcity mentality.


The Temptation to Hoard 


As fearful people we are inclined to develop a mind-set that makes us say:  "There's not enough food for everyone, so I better be sure I save enough for myself in case of emergency," or "There's not enough knowledge for everyone to enjoy; so I'd better keep my knowledge to myself, so no one else will use it" or "There's not enough love to give to everybody, so I'd better keep my friends for myself to prevent others from taking them away from me."   This is a scarcity mentality.  It involves hoarding whatever we have, fearful that we won't have enough to survive.  The tragedy, however, is that what you cling to ends up rotting in your hands.

Friday Reflections, May 11, 2012

Today's post comes again from Henri Nouwen, and struck me as appropriate this week as I talk about stories - stories about grief, and about journeying with my body.  It reminded me of how important each one of our stories is, and encouraged me as I continue to write mine out in this space.  I hope it encourages each of you as well.


Making Our Lives Available to Others

One of the arguments we often use for not writing is this:   "I have nothing original to say.  Whatever I might say, someone else has already said it, and better than I will ever be able to."  This, however, is not a good argument for not writing.  Each human person is unique and original, and nobody has lived what we have lived.  Furthermore, what we have lived, we have lived not just for ourselves but for others as well.  Writing can be a very creative and invigorating way to make our lives available to ourselves and to others.

We have to trust that our stories deserve to be told.  We may discover that the better we tell our stories the better we will want to live them.

Friday Reflections, May 4, 2012

Today's reflection is once again from Henri Nouwen, and reminds me of how valuable it is to ask questions, and not spend all of our time in answers, but to really honor the questions.


Question from Above

What are spiritual questions?  They are questions from above.  Most questions people ask of Jesus are questions from below, such as the question about which of  a woman's seven husbands she will be married to in the resurrection.   Jesus does not answer this question because it comes from a legalistic mind-set.  It is a question from below.

Often Jesus  responds by changing this question.  In the case of the woman with seven husbands he says, "At the resurrection men and women do not marry - have you never read what God himself said to you:  'I am God of Abraham, the God of Isaac and the God of Jacob?'  He is God not of the dead but of the living" (Matthew 22:23-30).

We have to keep looking for the spiritual question if we want spiritual answers.

Friday Reflections, April 27, 2012

Today's reflection is once again from Henri Nouwen, and is a reminder to me of why I continually pursue a life of healing and freedom.


Freedom Attracts 

When you are interiorly free you call others to freedom, whether you know it or not.  Freedom attracts wherever it appears.  A free man or a free woman creates a space where others feel safe and want to dwell.  Our world is so full of conditions, demands, requirements, and obligations that we often wonder what is expected of us.  But when we meet a truly free person, there are no expectations, only an invitation to reach into ourselves and discover there our own freedom.


Where true inner freedom is, there is God.  And where God is, there we want to be.

Friday Reflections - April 13, 2012

This meditation from Henri Nouwen landed in my inbox earlier this week.  After a semester of wandering through questions about leadership, group work, and conflict, it struck me as carrying deep truth that I need to ponder moving forward.


Authority and Obedience 

Authority and obedience can never be divided, with some people having all the authority while others only have to obey.  This separation causes authoritarian behaviour on the one side and doormat behaviour on the other.  It perverts authority as well as obedience.  A person with great authority who has nobody to be obedient to is in great spiritual danger.  A very obedient person who has no authority over anyone is equally in danger.

Jesus spoke with great authority, but his whole life was complete obedience to his Father, and Jesus, who said to his Father, "Let it be as you, not I, would have it" (Matthew 26:39), has been given all authority in heaven and on earth (see Matthew 28:18).   Let us ask ourselves:  Do we live our authority in obedience and do we live our obedience with authority?

Friday Reflections, March 9, 2012

This reminder from Henri Nouwen seemed like a good one to share in this space today:


Choosing Joy

Joy is what makes life worth living, but for many joy seems hard to find. They complain that their lives are sorrowful and depressing. What then brings the joy we so much desire? Are some people just lucky, while others have run out of luck? Strange as it may sound, we can choose joy. Two people can be part of the same event, but one may choose to live it quite differently than the other. One may choose to trust that what happened, painful as it may be, holds a promise. The other may choose despair and be destroyed by it.

What makes us human is precisely this freedom of choice.

Friday Reflections, March 2, 2012

Given that yesterday I shared in greater depth about my journey with food and eating disorders, it seems somehow appropriate to share some reflections from Henri Nouwen on the spiritual value of sharing a meal today.  Nouwen's thoughts on this subject have shaped some of my passion for sharing meals with friends, and for cooking, and fit nicely into the themes I seem to be exploring in this space lately.


The Meal That Makes Us Family and Friends

We all need to eat and drink to stay alive. But having a meal is more than eating and drinking. It is celebrating the gifts of life we share. A meal together is one of the most intimate and sacred human events. Around the table we become vulnerable, filling one another's plates and cups and encouraging one another to eat and drink. Much more happens at a meal than satisfying hunger and quenching thirst. Around the table we become family, friends, community, yes, a body.

That is why it is so important to "set" the table. Flowers, candles, colorful napkins all help us to say to one another, "This is a very special time for us, let's enjoy it!"

Friday Reflections, February 24, 2012

Today's reflection comes from Henri Nouwen once again, and explores the power of words:


Words That Create

Words, words, words. Our society is full of words: on billboards, on television screens, in newspapers and books. Words whispered, shouted, and sung. Words that move, dance, and change in size and color. Words that say, "Taste me, smell me, eat me, drink me, sleep with me," but most of all, "buy me." With so many words around us, we quickly say: "Well, they're just words." Thus, words have lost much of their power.

Still, the word has the power to create. When God speaks, God creates. When God says, "Let there be light" (Genesis 1:3), light is. God speaks light. For God, speaking and creating are the same. It is this creative power of the word we need to reclaim. What we say is very important. When we say, "I love you," and say it from the heart, we can give another person new life, new hope, new courage. When we say, "I hate you," we can destroy another person. Let's watch our words.

Friday Reflections, January 20, 2012

Today's Friday Reflection is once again written by Henri Nouwen, and is one well worth pondering.

Being Safe Places for Others

When we are free from the need to judge or condemn, we can become safe places for people to meet in vulnerability and take down the walls that separate them. Being deeply rooted in the love of God, we cannot help but invite people to love one another. When people realise that we have no hidden agendas or unspoken intentions, that we are not trying to gain any profit for ourselves, and that our only desire is for peace and reconciliation, they may find the inner freedom and courage to leave their guns at the door and enter into conversation with their enemies.

Many times this happens even without our planning. Our ministry of reconciliation most often takes place when we ourselves are least aware of it. Our simple, nonjudgmental presence does it.

Friday Reflections, January 13, 2012

Since my schedule has become significantly busier with the beginning of my classes, I've decided to introduce a new Friday feature.  For a while on Friday's, we're going to have "Friday Reflections".  For ages I've been collecting quotes and reflections that come to me from different sources, and now I want to share some of those here. Friday's, heading into the weekend seem like a good time for that.

So, to kick things off, I have a meditation written by Henri Nouwen:



The Still, Small Voice of Love

Many voices ask for our attention. There is a voice that says, "Prove that you are a good person." Another voice says, "You'd better be ashamed of yourself." There also is a voice that says, "Nobody really cares about you," and one that says, "Be sure to become successful, popular, and powerful." But underneath all these often very noisy voices is a still, small voice that says, "You are my Beloved, my favor rests on you." That's the voice we need most of all to hear. To hear that voice, however, requires special effort; it requires solitude, silence, and a strong determination to listen.

That's what prayer is. It is listening to the voice that calls us "my Beloved."

A Prayer to the God of Ebb and Flow

Some time ago, in the midst of my nightly reading, I flagged a prayer, with the same title as this post, written by Henri Nouwen, as something that I absolutely needed to share with all of you.  And today is the day for it!  Here you are:

A Prayer to the God of Ebb and Flow

Dear Lord, today I thought of the words of Vincent van Gogh: "It is true there is an ebb and flow, but the sea remains the sea.  You are the sea.  Although I experience many ups and downs in my emotions and often feel great shifts and changes in my inner life, you remain the same.  Your sameness is not the sameness of a rock, but the sameness of a faithful lover.  Out of your love I came to life; by your love I am sustained; and to your love I am always called back.  There are days of sadness and days of joy; there are feelings of guilt and feelings of gratitude; there are moments of failure and moments of success; but all of them are embraced by your unwavering love.

My only real temptation is to doubt in your love, to think of myself as beyond the reach of your love, to remove myself from the healing radiance of your love.  To do these things is to move into the darkness of despair.

O Lord, sea of love and goodness, let me not fear too much the storms and winds of my daily life, and let me know that there is an ebb and flow but that the sea remains the sea.  Amen.
(Seeds of Hope, pg. 88)

Daily 5 - Year 2, Day 345

Today's Daily 5:

1. Managing to laugh at a truly ridiculous customer service call I answered at work today
2. that it wasn't raining as I waited for the bus.
3. enjoying a quiet lunch, reading outside as I ate
4. working to begin cataloging my library
5. being challenged by the latest Henri Nouwen book I'm reading

A few from Henri

I'm running around this morning and don't have time to write my usual early morning rambling sort of post.  I'll be back later in the day with some of my own thoughts.  In the meantime, here are the first of many great throughts from Henri Nouwen that have backlogged in my email inbox over the last few months.

The Healing Touch


Touch, yes, touch, speaks the wordless words of love. We receive so much touch when we are babies and so little when we are adults. Still, in friendship touch often gives more life than words. A friend's hand stroking our back, a friend's arms resting on our shoulder, a friend's fingers wiping our tears away, a friend's lips kissing our forehead --- these are true consolation. These moments of touch are truly sacred. They restore, they reconcile, they reassure, they forgive, they heal.

Everyone who touched Jesus and everyone whom Jesus touched were healed. God's love and power went out from him (see Luke 6:19). When a friend touches us with free, nonpossessive love, it is God's incarnate love that touches us and God's power that heals us.

Travelling With the Eyes of God


Travelling - seeing new sights, hearing new music, and meeting new people - is exciting and exhilarating. But when we have no home to return to where someone will ask us, "How was your trip?" we might be less eager to go. Travelling is joyful when we travel with the eyes and ears of those who love us, who want to see our slides and hear our stories.

This is what life is about. It is being sent on a trip by a loving God, who is waiting at home for our return and is eager to watch the slides we took and hear about the friends we made. When we travel with the eyes and ears of the God who sent us, we will see wonderful sights, hear wonderful sounds, meet wonderful people ... and be happy to return home.

A Bunch from Henri

Over the busy last few weeks, some good stuff from Henri Nouwen has been collecting in my inbox again, including the following tid-bits:

The Beauty of Shyness


There is something beautiful about shyness, even though in our culture shyness is not considered a virtue. On the contrary, we are encouraged to be direct, look people straight in the eyes, tell them what is on our minds, and share our stories without a blush.

But this unflinching soul-baring, confessional attitude quickly becomes boring. It is like trees without shadows. Shy people have long shadows, where they keep much of their beauty hidden from intruders' eyes. Shy people remind us of the mystery of life that cannot be simply explained or expressed. They invite us to reverent and respectful friendships and to a wordless being together in love.

The Importance of Receiving


Receiving often is harder than giving. Giving is very important: giving insight, giving hope, giving courage, giving advice, giving support, giving money, and, most of all, giving ourselves. Without giving there is no brotherhood and sisterhood.

But receiving is just as important, because by receiving we reveal to the givers that they have gifts to offer. When we say, "Thank you, you gave me hope; thank you, you gave me a reason to live; thank you, you allowed me to realise my dream," we make givers aware of their unique and precious gifts. Sometimes it is only in the eyes of the receivers that givers discover their gifts.

Daring to Become Dependent


When someone gives us a watch but we never wear it, the watch is not really received. When someone offers us an idea but we do not respond to it, that idea is not truly received. When someone introduces us to a friend but we ignore him or her, that friend does not feel well received.

Receiving is an art. It means allowing the other to become part of our lives. It means daring to become dependent on the other. It asks for the inner freedom to say: "Without you I wouldn't be who I am." Receiving with the heart is therefore a gesture of humility and love. So many people have been deeply hurt because their gifts were not well received. Let us be good receivers.

Friends as Reminders of Our Truth


Sometimes our sorrow overwhelms us so much that we no longer can believe in joy. Life just seems a cup filled to the brim with war, violence, rejection, loneliness, and endless disappointments.

At times like this we need our friends to remind us that crushed grapes can produce tasty wine. It might be hard for us to trust that any joy can come from our sorrow, but when we start taking steps in the direction of our friends' advice, even when we ourselves are not yet able to feel the truth of what they say, the joy that seemed to be lost may be found again and our sorrow may become livable.

Authority and Obedience


Authority and obedience can never be divided, with some people having all the authority while others only have to obey. This separation causes authoritarian behaviour on the one side and doormat behaviour on the other. It perverts authority as well as obedience. A person with great authority who has nobody to be obedient to is in great spiritual danger. A very obedient person who has no authority over anyone is equally in danger.

Jesus spoke with great authority, but his whole life was complete obedience to his Father, and Jesus, who said to his Father, "Let it be as you, not I, would have it" (Matthew 26:39), has been given all authority in heaven and on earth (see Matthew 28:18). Let us ask ourselves: Do we live our authority in obedience and do we live our obedience with authority?

The Authority of Compassion


Mostly we think of people with great authority as higher up, far away, hard to reach. But spiritual authority comes from compassion and emerges from deep inner solidarity with those who are "subject" to authority. The one who is fully like us, who deeply understands our joys and pains or hopes and desires, and who is willing and able to walk with us, that is the one to whom we gladly give authority and whose "subjects" we are willing to be.

It is the compassionate authority that empowers, encourages, calls forth hidden gifts, and enables great things to happen. True spiritual authorities are located in the point of an upside-down triangle, supporting and holding into the light everyone they offer their leadership to.