Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Odd Deep Spaces (heart prayers)

My heart is in an odd spot today, sort of deep, unexplainable places. It started with a dream, and waking to find a note in my email inbox that spoke to the same themes as the dream in inexplicable ways. And it has carried on through the day...

Today my heart is praying:
  • with the memory of deep prayer for a group of young people half a world away; remembering and lifting up those who are grieving the death of one who was far too young.
  • while sipping passion tea and eating blackberries
  • from the place of waking from dreams and pondering
  • looking forward and looking back
  • while remembering words spoken and asking questions
  • while considering the warmth of the child I held in my arms last night
  • for friends that are now distant, as well as those who remain close
  • while aiming to offer genuine forgiveness
  • for wholeness
  • and health
  • and healing
  • for alternatives that work
  • and times of rest to be poured out
  • for provision just in the moments it is most necessary
  • for the release of control
  • because even in the moments I can't quite believe, I still long for restoration
  • as specific thoughts and cares weight heavy
  • seeking release and freedom
  • remembering flocks of birds - real and seen only with the eyes of my heart
  • in odd deep spaces with the gratefulness for a spirit who groans beyond words
  • amidst a busy day at work
  • watching
  • waiting
  • wondering
  • and sometimes even trusting
  • because my heart simply cannot help but cry out to Abba.