Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Quite the day...

To be fair, I had mostly a good day.

The first two thirds of it were productive. Things were flowing smoothly. I was settled in and happy, working hard on preparations for a conference our company is putting on this coming weekend.

I ran out to do an errand.

I came back, was handed some items to take care of, and asked what I thought was an innocent question. The response was less than ideal, and seemed to be indicative of a larger ongoing problem. It spiralled quickly from there.

A colleague and I handled the situation the way we've been instructed to. Let's just say that that we won't be doing that again. Because, you see, my boss flew off the handle at me, for bringing the situation to her attention (as per her previous instructions). She flew off the handle at the other person too.

There was shouting, and closed door conversations.

I'm not generally an angry person. I am often frustrated, but rarely do I descend into full on fury. Even when I feel hatred, it's usually a cold and distant thing, rather than a hot and wild thing.

But this was absolutely the last straw. I was so furious that my entire body was physically trembling with the adrenaline coursing through . I answered the phone and my voice shook. I sat for a few minutes in a colleague's office with the door shut and cried, waiting for my body to still.

Eventually things settled out.

Long conversations were had. Information was shared. There was crying on both parts.

And tomorrow I'm moving on.

There will not be a repeat of today. It is not healthy for me to have that much adrenaline coursing through my body when I already have issues with my health and energy levels. And, quite frankly, I will not be handling these sorts of situations that way ever again.

So, tomorrow is another day. I'll go back in, and work to forget the last third of today. And I'll keep doing the multitude of work necessary to get ready for the conference. And, quite likely, I'll keep to myself. Because that would seem to be the safer way to approach my office for a while.