Rescued From Myself

Every once in a while (maybe once or twice a month) I have a day that is entirely brutal. A day where nothing I do or say can hide the fact that my internal life that day is a mess. That I'm lost, confused, exhausted, sad, and sometimes even hopeless. Friday was one of those days.

Most days I can cope with the heaviest of heavy stuff. I can do my job, and seem normal, while being entirely broken inside.

I thought today was one of those days.

But, things kept getting worse. I was brooding and the stormy swirl of thoughts was growing larger and overwhelming by the minute.

Then Faye walked in the door of my office. She occasionally drops by to see if I'm free for lunch.

She did, and I was.

I needed rescuing from myself. I needed to not talk about myself, or my pain, or anything having to do with any number of situations that have ultimately resulted in my messy internal state.

Faye provided that rescue today.

And I laughed so hard at her recounting of certain recent events in her life that I nearly choked on my food and fell off my chair. For an hour I laughed.

And I feel oddly restored. Like I can make it through the remainder of the workday, until it's safe to go home and fall apart.