The Mostly Dark

I’m sitting here in the mostly dark, and the light from my laptop screen is reflecting off my glasses, catching on every speck of dust or smudge, and highlighting the fact that they need to be wiped clean. My chair is just below my window, and it’s open, letting in the cool late evening air, and the ambient noise from nearby streets. I’m at peace.

My life feels like that right now too… mostly dark, but at peace. No real illumination. Lots of places where I am paused, waiting for what comes next. Where I have taken every step that has thus far presented itself, and now I wait, in the mostly dark – just enough light to know that things beautiful and freeing are coming, but not enough light to yet claim them.

Maybe the mostly dark is what it’s all about anyway… just enough light to move from one step to the next. I’m thinking of a Bruce Cockburn lyric “…another step deeper into darkness/closer to the light…”

I’m thinking too about all the various scripture passages…

“Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path…”

“You will hear a voice behind you saying, ‘This is the way. Walk in it.”

“The Lord turns my darkness into light…”

“before I go…to the land of deepest night, of deep shadow and disorder, where even the light is like darkness…”

“He reveals the deep things of darkness and brings deep shadows into the light.”

“When I looked for light, then came darkness.”

“He redeemed my soul from going down to the pit and I will live to enjoy the light.”

“You, O Lord, keep my lamp burning. My god turns my darkness into light.”

“The people walking in darkness have seen a great light…”

Cockburn again:

Gone from mystery into mystery
Gone from daylight into night
Another step deeper into darkness
Closer to the light