Thursday, July 19, 2012

Wits End

It's been a while since I've talked about my journey with my body, and that's mostly because I've found myself at wits end.

Life got busy and my motivation to work at caring for my body dropped off.

I gained back all the weight I'd lost at the beginning of the year, and the beginning of this journey, and then I added a bit of extra weight.

I'm at a place where I look in the mirror and feel unhappy with what I see, but also recognize that what I see is largely a result of choices I've made.

And can I be honest? I'm not that motivated to change my habits.  I like eating sweet things and having the occasional glass of wine or cocktail.  I like not worrying about what I eat.  I don't like exercise - never have.  Yoga classes are the only thing I've ever really enjoyed, and I just don't have time to fit classes into my schedule at the moment.

I have some thoughts on how to change that, but for the moment, I'm at an all time low in motivation and an all time high in frustration.

In fact, even as I try to write this post, I find I've run out of things to say.  I'm stuck, a bit at wits end, and not totally motivated to change any of that.

I'm pretty sure I'm not the first to find myself in this place, and I'm wondering how those of you who have been here have navigated this space?