Juxtaposed

I spent a chunk of the evening unexpectedly with various family members tonight.

I'd made plans to go to my parents house after work, so that they could give me a ride to the mechanic to pick up George. I ended up staying for dinner, and then borrowing my dad's SUV to make a trip to Ikea to buy a bed frame and some under-bed storage so that I can really make a good attempt at settling in in our new house.

I'm feeling the juxtaposition tonight of being deeply thankful for my family (they've been immensely good to me always, but especially through the stress of the last couple of weeks), and also deeply missing some people who are very much the "family of my heart".

It's a weird sort of feeling, this inbetween juxtaposition. Kind of lonely. I feel my heart pulling back a little, waiting, and wondering if it is seen, if it is safe, or if it is simply exposed.

And so I'm waiting here, in the midst of a juxtaposition of thoughts. So thankful for family, and yet deeply longing for family, all at once.