What I've Been Up To

I noticed today as I was scanning some of the previous posts on my blog that I've been somewhat cryptic and circumspect over the last while.

A lot of that has had to do with the situations I've been dealing with. In order to protect the privacy of my friend, I've been unable to discuss the difficult things we've faced.

I also already mentioned that the situations in my friend's life, and the situations in my own life have driven me into an introspective, meditative, musing, muddled sort of state over the course of the month, that has not facilitated clear un-muddled writing.

With that said, here, in all its bullet-point glory is some of what I've been up to:

• I've done a LOT of reading. Nine or so books in fact. Not counting the two or three I'm currently reading. From the list, which is laying beside my computer on my desk, I recommend: Through the Narrow Gate by Karen Armstrong - a spiritual memoir about a woman who joins a catholic order, and eventually leaves, several years later. Messy Spirituality by Mike Yaconelli - I can't say enough good things about a book with the subtitle "God's Annoying Love for Imperfect People". Velma Still Cooks in Leeway by Vinita Hampton Wright - a beautiful, artistic, and deeply spiritual novel, without being trite or sappy.
• I've handled a lot of crises. Enough said.
• I've wrestled with family issues. Things with my parents. Areas of deep woundedness related to my family and upbringing.
• I've done a lot of desperate praying. I'm getting really good at the "help" type of prayers - for my own life and for others too.
• I'm learning to pray other things too. The single words like "hallelujah" and "immanuel" that I've mentioned here before. Brennan Manning's prayer, "Abba, I am Yours."
• I'm learning to listen a little more patiently for God. I'm still not hearing much, but I'm learning to pause and actually listen, not just fill every silence with words.
• I'm discovering a need to share my story. I have been blessed in the last few weeks a number of times by people who drew parts of the story of these crazy last months from me.

I think that's all I have to say for now. This is not everything. In fact, it's not even a snapshot in some ways. But I'm still feeling pretty introspective, I'm in the middle of a tense spot in a fairly enjoyable novel, I'm very tired, and I think I may heat up my "magic bag" and crawl into my cozy nook of a bed, and read, or journal, or possibly just sleep!