Of all the liars in the world...

Blue?

2010-01-04T11:08:00.000-07:00

The results of this are fairly accurate. And I do love the color blue, though I'm not certain it's my favorite. I'm not certain I have a favorite. I just know that I love color!

Your Favorite Color is Blue

You are a compassionate, empathetic, and sensitive person. You can truly put yourself in someone else's shoes.

You're known to be very soothing and understanding. Your friends can always turn to you in times of need.

You see the world realistically. You don't have any illusions about what is or isn't going on.

You are wise and thoughtful. You don't rush to judgement, and you think things through.

What's Your Favorite Color?

Work is Hard. Time for Blogthings!

Back at Work

2010-01-04T09:12:00.000-07:00

It's Monday morning and I am back in the office after 10 days off. 10 glorious days of sleeping until the sun was out. 10 glorious days of not answering a thousand phone calls and questions a day.

I got up before the sun did this morning. The sun that is only now, after I've been gone from home for an hour and a half, really starting to properly light the sky. And, I slept like crap last night. Odd dreams, telling me that things I'd thought were only slightly niggling worries are perhaps a slightly bigger deal within me than I was wanting to admit to myself.

And, just to make it fun, the cold I've been fighting for several days settled in in force last night. Oh, and my stomach clearly didn't get the memo that 2010 was going to be a healthy year for the first time in a while. Sigh. Could be an interesting day.

So, it's Monday morning and I'm back at work. There's a disaster on my desk, but it's not nearly as bad as I thought it was going to be. Time to get myself organized for the new year!

Daily 5 - Day 144

2010-01-03T21:26:00.000-07:00

Today's Daily "5":

Really slow lazy day... kind of necessary
Did finally clean out my closet though - well, except for the shoes, maybe I'll do that another day. Pleased to have purged a number of items from my wardrobe as well.
Budgeting - have I mentioned that even though I'm not exactly friends with numbers, I'm getting a certain perverse satisfaction out of the discipline of developing, maintaining, and living within a budget. I think it also comes from the sense of no longer being overwhelmed by my finances. The baby steps of really feeling like I can control the outcome of this. And it helps to have a budget that leaves a little bit of room for the extras now and then.
Grocery shopping is done for the week. After I picked L. up at the airport this afternoon, we stopped briefly at home and then headed right out to the grocery store. I absolutely love that this is not going to be an evening hanging over me this week.
Ceres brand mango juice (or the cranberry kiwi for that matter)
Jello. Yep, I have a fondness for jello.
chicken fingers and french fries again. I know, I only ate that yesterday, but my stomach did not get the memo that 2010 was supposed to be the year of health, and it's only been tolerating a few foods, and chicken fingers have been one of them.
Catching up (quickly) with my roommate about our various holidays
Candles lit in my bedroom for a large chunk of the day again
Enjoying the fruits of yesterday's cleaning with a tidy, uncluttered bedroom, and a clearer headspace in many ways.

The Alphabet Project

2010-01-03T19:50:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I wrote a post that included as one of my goals for 2010 that I would work on an alphabet photography/scrapbooking project.

I bought this great set of rub-ons on a trip to the scrapbook store the other day (on 70% off clearance no less!) that was the alphabet with a word for each letter, and all of the words seem to fit well with my ongoing theme of choosing life and joy and hope. So, the plan is to take a photo (or several) for each letter and word, and create a scrapbook page with journaling explaining why that photo speaks to that word/theme for me. I'm not much of a scrapbooker anymore, but I like the challenge of needing to come up with photographs for more abstract words (remember that another goal was to develop a bit at photography), and I feel like 26 pages over the course of the year (just over 2 a month) is a very doable achievement. Plus, I like that it pushes me to pull out and use the supplies I've accumulated over the years, and to need to be creative in making a page that suits the letter and the photo.

So, without further ado, let me share the alphabet with you. (Let me know if you have good ideas for any of the words!)

A is for adorable
B is for beautiful
C is for cute

(okay, let me just pause for a second and say that in those first few letters I'm clearly going to need to arrange to spend time with some of the friends who've recently had babies. because an evening of cuddling a baby is going to be a real hardship for me!)

D is for delightful
E is for elegant
F is for fantastic
G is for generous
H is for happy
I is for industrious
J is for joyful
K is for kind
L is for loving
M is for magical

(LP/CA - I sense you might not only have some travel ideas for me, but also a suggestion for the letter "m"!)

N is for neat
O is for original
P is for pretty
Q is for quiet
R is for real
S is for silly
T is for thankful
U is for unique
V is for vivacious
W is for wonderful
X is for X-citing
Y is for youthful
Z is for zany

I haven't decided quite yet if I will do these in order, or just do them as I manage to capture a moment that fits a word, or maybe some of both. I do like the idea of mostly doing them in order, just for the fact that it forces me to really create vivacious, or real, or cute, or industrious (or whatever!) moments - to be deliberate in creating the story with my life.

Sometimes they make me crazy

2010-01-03T10:10:00.000-07:00

I love lists. That is a well documented fact. I especially love the goofy little moment of satisfaction that comes from checking something off of a list.

But sometimes the lists make me crazy.

I'm still in bed again - it's sort of become a habit over this vacation, and not one I'm all that upset about, given the chronic lack of rest in my life.

But this morning, some list items are taunting me as I lay here. Things I meant to do yesterday and didn't quite manage to accomplish. Nothing spectacular. But there's a taunting. "You shouldn't stay in bed. Get up and be productive. Especially since L. comes home this afternoon and then the house will have noise and another person and won't be nearly as peaceful. Get up and take advantage of that peace."

Some of that mentality is passed on. My mom grew up with it - the never a moment of stillness thing - and in the many years of my life before she began her own long journey of healing, there was ample time for me to absorb it. Also to fight against it. As a teenager I fought against it in a defiant manner. A "no, I'm going to do what I want" sort of manner. But it's what was modeled for me as what "adults" do, and in the years I've lived on my own, I've found it has at times become a reality. Ironic, since, while I am just beginning this journey of combatting it, my mom has found much healing, and is increasingly embracing moments that are just for her, and not filled with activity.

Eventually, I will get out of bed. There are a few things I really do want to get done before I have to head to the airport this afternoon to pick L. up. But, for the moment, I'm reminding myself that health and rest need to be a priority for me, and that I had a rough night last night, filled with tossing and turning, wakefulness, and odd dreams, and that it's okay to be laying here, resting.

Sometimes the lists are the most helpful thing in my life. Sometimes they make me crazy. But I'm learning to combat their accusing stares, and remember why I make them in the first place - to help me get the most out of life - and to remember that sometimes the most out of life means sleeping late, or resting because it's the better option, even when the list of stuff to do is long.

Daily 5 - Day 143

2010-01-02T23:16:00.000-07:00

Today's Daily "5":

Learning from dad how to check the level of antifreeze, and the tire pressure in George (and checking and adding oil, as well as refilling my windshield fluid while I was at it.) I feel a bit pathetic for admitting it, but it made me feel good to know how to do those things, and my dad was patient in teaching me. It was sort of one of those moments that is a bit hard to explain, but in some ways, learning these basic things about caring for my car was a way of showing myself that I am strong and capable, and increasingly independent. Funny, I suppose, for someone who's been living on her own for a number of years, but moments like this, or like the appointment at the bank this week to me have really been about stepping up and asserting myself, and understanding and taking control of a challenging situation - of reducing my debt and saving for the future at the bank, and of knowing how to manage a minor problem with George (an antifreeze leak) and keep an eye on it so it doesn't become a major problem
chicken fingers and french fries for lunch (the new healthier version of the chicken fingers that I picked up the other day) - still one of my favorite, quick "comfort" meals
a really productive day
candles lit in various spots around the house for most of the day
going through my bookshelves and updating my list of unread titles (I should maybe stop buying books, I think the unread list of books I own is now around 160) and thinking about which books to read next for the coming year
cleaning my bedroom really well, and restoring it to a really peaceful space for dreaming and creating and thinking and praying over the coming year. I think cleaning is often still a form of prayer for me, and a way of creating space for new things within me, even as I clean my physical space.
also cleaning a bunch of the rest of the house. So nice to just have a clean space to exist in.
Just really enjoying the last day of having an empty house. I love my roommate, and I'll be glad to see her when I pick her up tomorrow, but I sure do enjoy the times when I have the house all to myself.
dreaming and scheming for the coming year
A slow start this morning, laying in bed, reading blogs and articles about the new year - fun to see so many different people's thoughts

A Better Story: Hope List for 2010

2010-01-02T22:14:00.000-07:00

I've talked before about Donald Miller's latest book, "A Million Miles in a Thousand Years: What I Learned While Editing My Life". I've read all of Miller's books, and next to "Blue Like Jazz", this one is definitely my favorite (it may even beat out "Blue Like Jazz" - I can't quite decide!)

In any case, I read the book a few months back, when I was in the midst of needing to really make some decisions about whether or not I was going to stand up and take control of some issues in my life. In fact, I distinctly recall sitting in my doctor's office, on a day when I had an appointment that ended up being pivotal in terms of the decisions that appointment forced me to make, and reading this book. The doctor was running late, and as I sat there fighting back the panic attacks I was dealing with that day, I was reading and being challenged by the idea of writing a better story with my life.

My roommate gave me a magnet for Christmas, printed with an art piece from Curly Girl Design, that I saw on a canvas months and months ago, and have been hunting for in some smaller form ever since. The quote on the art piece that made me fall in love with it reads, "The world is full of people who will go their whole lives and not actually LIVE one day. She did not intend on being one of them." I loved that - "she did not intend on being one of them" - and it kind of became a personal mantra of sorts. That I want to tell a great story with my life, and to really live.

I'll share some quotes from Miller's book sometime in the next day or two, but for the moment, I wanted to share the list of goals, hopes, dreams, resolutions, things to do (pick your favorite term and insert it here) that I formulated for the new year over the last few days.

I'm sort of famous for making lists, and equally famous for adding a great deal of flexibility to the lists, and I'm sure that this one will grow and morph and change as the circumstances of the year shape it, but for now, I'm going to call this my "hope list" or my "better story list" and share the things (well, the formal things anyway) that I'm planning and dreaming about for this new year that is in front of me, this beginning to a new decade.

Learn how L. makes frittata, hamburger soup, and pita chips (these are some staples of our roommate cooking, that I never make. L. returns to New Zealand at the beginning of March and I want to learn to prepare these particular recipes before she leaves.)
Alphabet photography and scrapbooking project (a post on this to come in the next day or two)
Develop my photography skills
See U2 live in concert (only a major life dream - and one I am definitely going to fulfill this year thanks to the tickets I've already purchased for a June show)
attend at least one "real" yoga class (just because I'm curious, and because I've enjoyed the yoga videos and would like to do the real deal at least one time)
read the equivalent of at least 1 non-fiction book per month. basically, read at least twelve non-fiction books this year.
continue to exercise consistently
continue to consistently use a regime of vitamins
cook at least 2 recipes a month and take photos of them (I love cooking, it's one of my current favorite creative expressions. I also love feeding people. The goal is simply to expand my repertoire and find some new creative expression.)
work on significantly reducing my debt load (thankful for the good appointment at the bank just before the new year began that should really help with achieving this)
continue to write Daily 5 lists, and to search for joy and things to be thankful for in the midst of the challenges of daily life
Embrace Joy
Choose Life (consistently - choose to really live)
settle into and be involved somehow with a church or house church (this one is hard for me, but I'm feeling the need to really try to find community around me again)
work on making new friends (again, a real challenge for an introvert who would prefer to spend the vast majority of her time alone, but I have been missing having community and a support network of caring, praying friends who are near enough in location to give hugs when they're needed, so I'm going to make an effort at this, hopefully via finding a church or house church)
Continue the rhythm of blogging regularly (love the chance to just show up somewhere and talk about my day)
Purge and simplify wherever possible (I'm likely moving again within the next few months, I have way more stuff than I likely need, and I'm sincerely wanting, within reason to really limit my consumerism and consumption)
Save money for a rainy day (or for travelling, a new car, or a new laptop since I'm pretty sure either George or my trusty macbook are going to keel over in the next year, and since, well, I just love to travel)
Finish memorizing the book of Philippians (considering I'm only about 15 of 104 verses in, and having a hard time finding a rhythm of working at this, this one will require a bit of discipline)
Work on learning to be okay with (and not feel guilty about) spending money on my personal appearance (ie. haircuts, the occasional manicure or pedicure - I've felt guilty for a long time for spending money on myself in this way... it's okay to buy things like books or whatever, but to spend money on my hair or nails always seemed so frivolous and wrong. Part of the journey of learning to really love myself for me is being willing to care about how I look, and that means being willing to spend a bit of money on how I look.)
travel somewhere (LP/CA - you have any suggestions ??? :) )
because of stress and illness over the past two years, I lost a significant amount of weight. now that I'm slowly regaining my health, I'd like to maintain that weight loss (not gain it back) via the other things I already mentioned about diet, vitamins, exercise etc.
be intentional in writing down the important stories (on my blog, in my journal - there are some stories that are important from this past year that months later I still haven't recorded because I wasn't intentional about sitting down and doing it. I'd like to be more intentional with that in the coming year.)

So, that's my list. For the moment at least. Like I said, I'm sort of infamous for the morphing flexibility of my lists, so I'm sure it will grow and shift and change. But, for the moment, I'm pleased with it. It was a list I wrote prayerfully, and I think encourages the things I value, and forces me to choose regularly to really live. As I said, there will be more posts to come in the next few days surrounding all of this, but for tonight, I have a daily 5 list still to write, and then I need to quiet down and head for sleep I think.

Who Are You to Yourself?

2010-01-02T11:47:00.000-07:00

This quiz title made me smile. Mostly because it seemed like a good quiz for the beginning of a new year. The questions made me smile because they were all based around waves and being near the ocean - I've had many, many discussions about waves the last few years, and I love oceans, and large bodies of water in general. The results were actually fairly accurate of me as well.

You Take Yourself Seriously

You see yourself as a thoughtful and introspective person. You are very intelligent.

You think other people see you as friendly, happy, and charming. You tend to get along well with everyone.

You want to see yourself as independent and free wheeling. You'd like to do your own thing more often.

You identify as a compassionate and accepting person. You pride yourself on being forgiving.

Who Are You to Yourself?

Blogthings: Our Quizzes Weren't Written By Bored 12 Year Olds

Planning a Day

2010-01-02T11:28:00.000-07:00

It's 11:10 am or so, and for the first time in months I didn't eat breakfast several hours ago. As we speak I'm munching on a granola bar that will serve as breakfast.

I woke up for the first time around 8, but I'm trying to be disciplined in this time off from work to really rest - not just immediately roll out of bed and start doing. So, at 8 I rolled over and told myself that I was not getting up until at least nine, and that I might as well just go back to sleep. Surprisingly (for me) it worked, and I slept until close to 10!

I've spent the last hour or so catching up on blogs and checking out some new ones. Just after the new year is a great time to read blogs because everyone is talking about newness, goals, dreams, and practical ways to get to those things. And, well, I may have mentioned at some point that I have a thing for newness.

So, I'm sitting here, propped up in bed, and considering the day ahead. There is only one non-negotiable on my list for today - make it to Mom and Dad's during daylight hours to get Dad to show me how to manage a couple of simple maintenance tasks for George on my own.

The rest of the list for the day looks something like this, with total flexibility for time, fun changes in plan, or just the desire to really rest and enjoy one the last full day I'll have the house to myself. (Tomorrow my roommate returns, and Monday we both go back to work.)

finish cleaning up my bedroom
write at least one blog post with hopes, dreams, goals, thoughts on story, and whatever else strikes my fancy for the new year (there are a couple brewing - the list post, the alphabet post, and a couple posts looking back at 2009, things that surprised me, and so forth)
clean my closet
spend time reading
connect in some manner with a dear friend a long way away
email A. in Toronto and set up a time for a skype catch-up and pray together date
send a thank you email to a relative in the states for a Christmas gift
connect with a couple of local friends to set up times to get together in the coming few weeks
clean the bathroom

Who knows... I could go to my parent's house to learn how to better care for George, and get invited to stay, and I'd likely accept, for a while anyway. Or maybe I'll just hole up in my house for the entire day, with movies and music playing, and clean.

Daily 5 - Day 142

2010-01-01T23:39:00.000-07:00

Welcome to 2010. Or at least the technical first daily 5 list of 2010. (Technical since I'm pretty sure I wrote the daily 5 for December 31, 2009 at like 1:30 this morning.)

Today's Daily 5:

Zoo trip
Giggling at the anteaters - I really can't quite explain just what kind of a moment that was. It was beautiful to just feel those giggles kind of well up inside me and escape. For me, after such a hard year, and so much sadness, and having to so deliberately choose joy and thankfulness at every turn, it was a special gift from a loving Abba to stand there, watching that crazy part of creation, and feel the joy simply well up within me and burst forth. It was a really wonderful way to begin the year.
Watching a movie with mom and dad, T. & L.
The annual Chinese food New Year's day dinner with both of my parents, both brothers, and L.
The ironic moment of being goaded into opening a fortune cookie I wasn't particularly wanting to eat, "just for the fortune" and cracking mine open to discover it didn't have a fortune! Not sure what that says about my year to come! But it was a pretty funny moment.
Playing crokinole and Dutch Blitz with mom and dad and J.
time this afternoon to do a bit of cleaning in my bedroom
making a list of goals, hopes, dreams, self-reminders etc. for the coming year
taking photos at the zoo this morning with Dad's camera
Clean laundry - yep, I kicked off the new year with washing my sheets and towels, and other laundry. Because there's something about celebrating newness with such fresh smelling sheets, towels and pajamas to crawl into at the end of the jay. I know, it's weird, but it really is a joyful thing for me.

Story

2010-01-01T23:29:00.000-07:00

I was thinking again today about story, and how it shapes and forms us. More thoughts on that to come in the coming days, but here are a couple of links worth checking out.

Donald Miller talks about living a good story, and New Year's on his blog. Worth reading. I'll be blogging more about his book "A Million Miles in a Thousand Years" in the coming days.

Ali Edwards chooses a word for each year, and this year her word was Story, inspired, in part, it turns out, by Donald Miller's book.

I made a list today, of some goals or resolutions or hopes and dreams for the new year. I'll share those likely tomorrow.

In the meantime, I also liked Dana's post at Of Wool and Water looking back and looking forward to 2010. Here's to a year of new beginnings!

Zoo Year's Day :)

2010-01-01T14:03:00.000-07:00

I started the new decade and new year off with a trip to the zoo. I love heading there on days when I know it won't be busy, because it's so much easier to just sit or stand and appreciate the animals, without other people pushing to catch a glimpse.

I had several objectives this morning - visit "my" gorillas, see if the new baby giraffe was on display yet (nope), check out the newly redesigned and re-opened conservatory, and see the giant anteaters.

Here are some photos, and a couple of videos from the morning. The rest of the photos can be found in a facebook album here.

The videos are of the giant anteater, which is currently one of my favorite creatures. Mostly because it's so entirely bizarre with that long nose, skinny body, and feather duster tail. I stood and watched him for probably 10 minutes this morning, giggling out loud at how funny he looked!

Hanging out at the zoo is a great way to start the year. The incredible creativity of God is so on display, and it's a place I find so incredibly peaceful and full of the certainty that God is a God of hope and creativity and laughter and beauty and new things - all reminders I've needed regularly through the difficult last few years.

Daily 5 - Day 141

2010-01-01T01:00:00.000-07:00

Happy New Year! Okay, now that we've got that out of the way, here's the December 31st edition of the Daily 5. We'll revisit the whole new year/new decade/dreams/plans/hopes/resolutions/goals thing in the morning, after I've slept for several hours.

Today's Daily 5:

Brief conversation and "e-hugs" with a dear friend who understood in a way most wouldn't have
A few great deals at the scrapbooking store this morning, including something that will I think be a challenge for the new year
Finishing a book I've been reading for months (more on that to come as well)
Finishing the rather larger than I originally thought project of organizing all of my recipes
Mostly enjoying a quiet day alone, even if it was one of the harder days of the holiday season for me
cooking hamburgers for lunch on the George Foreman grill my parents gave me in August for my birthday - the George Foreman definitely ranks up there in terms of birthday gifts - or at least in terms of really boring "practical" birthday gifts :)
Hanging with my parents and their friends tonight - better than being alone I think - though I've got to tell you that I've got tons of dirt for the next time they accuse my brothers and I of having warped minds! After several hours with all of these people, some of whom we're related to, and some of whom we've basically known via the church since birth, well, I think I know where we got the warped minds!
Watching the cooking movie "No Reservations" while I typed and sorted and organized recipes (thought it seemed appropriate)
Loving the new straightening styling product I picked up at the salon yesterday. the second attempt at flat ironing my hair when quite a bit more smoothly than the first, thanks in large part to the new styling product.
141 days of daily 5 lists, to round out a really challenging year - grateful for the way it does help me think through my day and see things differently, recognizing the things I can be so thankful for.

Mourning and Thankful

2009-12-31T17:45:00.000-07:00

I was doing pretty well with the whole New Year's Eve thing until I chatted briefly with a dear friend on the other side of the country. Then, the tears flowed for a while.

I find it hard not to mourn the relationships that have so changed, or been so broken.

I wrestle with the appropriate way to grieve those changes without being caught permanently in the brokenness of the moments.

So, I cried, and then I got up, and showered, and straightened my hair (not an easy task, or one I'm particularly good at yet.)

In a little while I'll head over to my parent's home for the evening. I'll spend some time with them and their friends, and I'll likely be home early (for new year's anyway.)

I'll take the baking that I haven't yet managed to give away, and see if I can get more of it enjoyed by others.

And I'll remember the many blessings of the year, even while mourning the broken moments.

I'll be back later with a daily 5 - maybe before midnight, or maybe not.

Happy New Year.

A Few New Year's Thoughts

2009-12-31T10:11:00.000-07:00

I think, after the busy day I had yesterday, today is probably going to be a mostly "at home" day. (Though I think I'm going to make a quick trip to a local scrapbooking store to see if anything catches my eye and inspires me to create a bit.)

I need to do some cleaning, and some reading, and some resting.

I was reading facebook statuses this morning, and people are so excited for the new year and the new decade.

I suppose I am excited, and tomorrow, when it's actually here, I likely will be excited, given that I do have that often professed love for newness and new beginnings.

But New Year's Eve is one of my least favorite holidays of the year. Actually, it's probably absolutely the least favorite. I like it even less than Valentines Day!

I think it's because, of all the "holidays" in a year, New Year's Eve is the one that seems to be the most about being with friends, or with a significant other. I think it's also a holiday where it definitely helps to be a bit extroverted, and to love a party.

It's New Year's Eve that I probably most feel the change of relationships in my life over the last couple of years - the loss of some valuable friendships, and the changes in others. That I feel the most isolated and alone. It's probably the night that I feel the most out of step with the people around me, too, preferring by personality a quiet evening shared with perhaps a few close friends, or watching a movie, over a boistrous party and games.

Last year was a particularly challenging New Year's Eve. I think I spent a very large portion of it in tears, wrestling within me over brokenness, before quietly forming a communion of my own and heading for bed long before the midnight change of years.

I've been invited to join my parents and some of their friends tonight. And I probably will for a while anyway - for some food and some laughter. But if I was guessing, I'd say that I'll still be home long before midnight, and, that if I'm up at midnight, I will be quietly welcoming a new decade with prayer and possibly tears.

Don't get me wrong - I'm looking forward to the newness. Dreaming about what the year to come may hold. But today I'm also feeling a bit the melancholy of things that have ended, and it's a funny balance within my heart.

So with that, I'm off to take in at least part of the day. See you later!

Daily 5 - Day 140

2009-12-30T23:40:00.000-07:00

Today's Daily 5:

A really productive day
Discovering that I have good credit and being granted the line of credit I was hoping for
A really helpful, polite guy at the bank
Take out Chinese food
time with family

A Very Good Meeting

2009-12-30T17:53:00.000-07:00

I had a very good meeting at the bank this afternoon.

Actually, I've had a very productive day all around. I went to the bottle depot and returned the empties I'd collected from work and home and emerged about $9 richer. I did the recycling. I grocery shopped. I bought supplies for George, and filled George's gas tank. I bought hair styling product to help straighten my hair. I updated my budget - twice. I paid a bunch of bills. I made jello, and bought Chinese take-out for lunch. I put some important letters in the mail. I got my daytimer/calendar for 2010 in useable, working order. And I had the meeting at the bank.

Turns out that in spite of a decent amount of debt - the credit card debt I mentioned this morning, and government student loans, I have very good credit. So good, in fact that the line of credit I applied for was immediately approved. Apparently, according to the guy I met with, that's very rare. And I have a credit score that's one of the highest he's seen. Sweet!

I was so thankful for the guy I met with. While I appreciated the lady I met with at the beginning of the month to open my new accounts at this bank, she was a little bit demeaning in her manor, and not very patient with my infinite number of questions in an attempt to make sure I understood exactly what was happening with MY finances. (I personally think it's fairly reasonable that I would want to understand that!) The guy today was totally not like that. He answered all of my questions quite patiently, showed me what I needed to see, and went above and beyond as far as I was concerned. He was personable, and amiable, and generally didn't make me feel at all like I was stupid or an inconvenience for having questions.

So, in a couple of days, once a payment I made this morning (pre-line of credit) goes through on my credit card, and I have an exact balance, I'll be credit debt free! Or at least credit card balance free. Since I'll still owe the money and everything. But hey, the line of credit is less than half of the interest rate I was paying on my credit cards, so that should be absolutely fantastic in terms of helping with my goal to get rid of all of that debt as soon as possible. And for that, I'm also so incredibly grateful.

It's been a good day - the kind I'm always thankful for. And I'm especially grateful that I have had this week off of work to catch up on these myriad of other tasks that would have eaten whole portions of much needed evenings and weekends otherwise. It's nice to be able to accomplish all of these little things, but to do them at a pace that doesn't leave me feeling frantic or exhausted at the end of the day.

Congested with a Chance of Snow

2009-12-30T10:13:00.000-07:00

I suppose it was inevitable. At work, everyone was sick. At Christmas, at least three or four relatives had ugly head colds, including two immediate family members. And now, I seem to have caught it as well.

Thankfully, at the moment, it seems to be restraining itself to the mild annoyance sort of head cold, and I'm praying that it will limit itself to this, and not feel the need to really go for broke and make me feel sick and miserable for my last several days off. To that end I've beefed up my already extensive vitamin routine, and, like I said, I'm hoping and praying for the best.

In other news, it's snowing. Because the feet of the white stuff we've already had this winter wasn't enough. Should make doing errands for a large portion of this day good fun.

My paycheque (after a bit of worrying and trepidation) actually made it via direct deposit into my new bank account overnight. Which means that today I can do things I've been putting off, to make sure there remained enough money in my bank account to cover rent, just in case. Things like buying a few groceries, getting a few supplies for maintaining George, and other super exciting moments. Groceries, recycling, an auto parts shop, the bottle depot - all of these are definitely favorite locations of mine.

Oh, and the bank. I have a meeting at the bank today, to inquire about loans or lines of credit. Because, you see, after returning a few years back from my trip to Malta, I sort of relied on my credit cards to live for a while, until paycheques started coming regularly again. And the credit card debt sort of spooled from there a bit, and now I'm paying huge interest as I budget and try to pay that debt off. So I have a meeting at the bank today to see if I can get a line of credit or a loan, to reduce the interest percentage I'm paying, and hopefully get out of debt quite a bit faster. Sweet. Here's hoping it's someone personable that I meet with, and not someone who treats me a little bit like a fool for having credit debt in the first place, or for not being some incredibly financially savvy individual. Because I've met a few of those types of people as I've been navigating some of these banking changes, and there's nothing quite as frustrating as being demeaned by a person you're sort of dependent on for service.

And after all those things, I'll be home again, tackling more items on the list for the week, and updating my budget. I think I may have been a bit overzealous in my list making, so I'm trying to pick out the things that I really think are priorities. The rest can be relegated to evenings and weekends in the coming month. Especially since some of them are just things that I want to accomplish before the quite likely reality of moving again at the end of February. Things like going through clothing and belongings and paring down a bit again. And sorting through some grocery and snack food items that have sort of collected, so that they can be eaten before more are purchased.

And with that, I'm going to venture up and out and start doing things like online banking, and errands. Or maybe I'll just start by crawling out of bed, where I've been sitting and eating my breakfast while writing this post. Clothes instead of pajamas would be good - they'll probably help my chances of not being treated demeaningly at the bank later. And brushing my hair, that'll also probably help. And then I'll start doing things like online banking and budget updates and errands.

Daily 5 - Day 139

2009-12-29T22:46:00.000-07:00

Today's Daily "5":

My cheques finally arriving in the mail. Since they were supposed to be here well over a week ago, and I was needing to write some first of January cheques for a few people (including my rent!) I was getting a little nervous and scheming about backup plans.
Straightening my hair on my own for the first time - not stellar results, but not bad either.
Lunch and shopping with a friend from high school
new sweater - suitable for work or casual wear
instructions from dad on what little items I need to purchase before he shows me a few things about maintaining George later this week
watching a movie while I worked on a bunch of stuff tonight
finally being able to write postdated rent cheques to our landlords and leave them for pick up - so nice to have that item off of my list
really enjoying having the house to myself this week that I'm off while L. is out of town
laughing at little ironies
thankful that the cold I've caught (quite a few people were sick at Christmas) has for the moment stayed in the mild annoyance range, instead of becoming a problem.

Not a Bad Way to Spend an Evening

2009-12-29T19:18:00.000-07:00

I'm spending the evening doing exciting things like writing post-dated cheques, updating my budget, addressing an insurance claim, and various and sundry other little necessities that have stacked up.

I spent 25 minutes on the phone with the phone company, working to get a bill adjusted. (They were going to charge me an extra $200 as a non-return fee for something I mailed back to them in October, and still had a copy of the tracking number and bill of lading as proof.)

I'm sore today - clearly my massage therapist did a good job on the muscles in my neck, shoulders and back yesterday. They're still much looser, but they hurt like I've been through a long workout.

So I'm sitting here, working on a long list of little things that I want to accomplish this week while I'm off work, and watching a movie all at the same time.

It's not a bad way to spend an evening really.

Light and Darkness

2009-12-29T09:30:00.000-07:00

I really appreciated this post that Allie Dearest wrote this morning.

Particularly this first bit: "I notice that people who grew up in the light, so to speak, like to play around with darkness a whole lot more than people who've lived in it."

Makes me think about so many people I know. And about choices I've made too. Stirs the heart to confession and prayer.

Blue Ideas

2009-12-29T09:19:00.000-07:00

First, let me just say that this is a fairly accurate description of how I think. And secondly, I love the color blue. I love lots of colors, but I once had a blue bedroom. And it was my favorite bedroom ever. I loved the color - it was so comforting to me. It's now my dad's office, and I live in an apartment, but I still like the color blue.

Your Ideas Are Blue

When you think, you tend to have very detailed, well thought out ideas.

You take your time with your thoughts. You are a deep thinker who likes to explore every possibility.

Your ideas tend to be very innovative and perceptive. It's amazing what your mind can come up with.

Your mind is energetic and alert. You are "always on" and thinking of new things. It's hard for you to relax.

What Color Ideas Do You Have?

Blogthings: We Have a Quiz for Almost Everything

Daily 5 - Day 138

2009-12-28T22:40:00.000-07:00

Today's Daily "5":

Sleeping late, and having a slow, lazy morning
picking out a hair straightener (I apparently got rid of my old one the last time we moved, and needed one now that my hair is shorter again) that didn't seem to be on sale and getting to the cashier and discovering it was on sale for a very good price.
massage appointment
bumping into T. at the library (we were at the same branch, independently, and I just happened to run into him there), and chatting for a few minutes
coming home from the library with some interesting potential reads
manicure/pedicure - probably won't return to this particular nail salon, but enjoyed soaking my feet, and having someone else pamper me a bit.
bacon and peas pasta dish for dinner
my own home-made jam drop cookies
chatting with a dear friend for a while tonight
making some progress on my "to do" list for the week, and feeling good about what I've accomplished today.

A Few Quick Links

2009-12-28T11:52:00.000-07:00

I have a few links to share with you.

I liked this blog post that someone linked to on Facebook this morning. Particularly the quote in the middle of the post from the rabbi, but the bulk of the post as well.

I was also flipping through a few of my blog archives this morning, and came across a link to this cartoon at Naked Pastor. I chuckled as I remembered what I was going through when I first saw it, and how relevant it was then, and I chuckled again as I recognized the new moments and situations and how it continues to be rather relevant now.

Monday Morning, Year End Musings

2009-12-28T10:11:00.000-07:00

On mornings like this, when I am not working, and have stayed up later than normal, I'm grateful that my bedroom window faces south, and looks out onto the apartment building next door. When I woke this morning, around 8:30 or 9:00 or so, my bedroom was still dimly lit, and conducive to sleep. Under my door, from the hallway I could see bright light. This is a sunbeam, from my roommate's east facing bedroom window. Her bedroom may be larger, but mine stays nice and dark.

Incidentally, I wish my days ran on a different schedule. My body seems to thrive on slow mornings, and later nights like I've been having because of the holidays. This is clearly not an option when I need to rise early in the morning to be at work on time, and I regret that. Some of my most clear thinking and productive hours seem to come in the time after I already need to be in bed when I have to work the next day.

As it is, at the moment I'm still in my pajamas, sitting in bed, eating a banana for breakfast and planning out my day. I made a call to confirm a massage appointment for later this afternoon (gotta use up that insurance coverage before the end of the year!), and I'm contemplating spoiling myself just a little by going for a manicure sometime today or tomorrow as well. I need to do some cleaning around our house, but other than that, the day is looking pretty low key.

I got my new calendar/day planner for 2010 a few weeks back, and I made myself save it for this week that I'm off. I love going through a new calendar and filling in important dates. Birthdays and anniversaries and other fun stuff. I love staring at all of the blank dates and thinking of the wonderful possibilities to fill them. I love dreaming about what might come. Because the dreams, at least, don't cost anything. Yes, my budget is tight, but that doesn't need to impede the dreaming. And the dreaming is the truly fun part anyway - it's a bonus (an extra special one, I'll admit) when the dreams become some sort of reality.

I like looking forward. I'm thinking about the things I'd like to do in the new year. Not goals or resolutions persay, but things I'd like to try, or see or do.

So this week, while I putter around the house, and around the city, there's time reserved for dreaming. For looking forward. For waiting and hoping and praying.

I'm thinking about some friends down in Mexico this week. They left on boxing day to make the drive down and spend some time building a house for a family who desperately needs one. I don't know many on the team, just their leader. A chaplain at the university I attended who managed to impact my life simply by caring about how I was doing on a day to day basis. I still enjoy the occasional coffee with him, catching up on things. He's been leading these teams for years - students from two local post-secondary institutions, Christian or not, and I have at least one friend who met Jesus simply because she was stunned to encounter him in this team of people she'd joined over the Christmas semester break to do something humanitarian. I'm grateful for people like my chaplain friend, loving on students who really need it, and introducing them to Jesus gently with his life as much as with his words.

And with that, I'd better crawl out of bed and head into the day. There are at least a few things I should really try to accomplish today, and this week, starting with a list of what needs to be accomplished today/this week!

Hope your day is fabulous!